Cutey Zone

General Category => Cute Discussion => Topic started by: SquareWheel on September 25, 2020, 03:13:03 AM

Title: News Purge: 2020-09-25
Post by: SquareWheel on September 25, 2020, 03:13:03 AM

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

~Weclome to CuteyZone, the Place to Be!~


first


happy new forum! ^^


cat planet cutey zone


future cutey game


(https://40.media.tumblr.com/44f2bc528487f252f18ca9798d6df4ff/tumblr_o0uupkeWg61r5pvhjo1_540.png)
First Loss of Cutey Zone News 2016


wait oh no oops that breaks the skin

hmmm...............


smf2 has a "paid subscriptions" feature built in so look forward to official cutey zone premium memberships coming soon......


bronze cutey zone tier: musicembed tags & the ability to purchase tiers silver to platinum
silver cutier: ability to upcute 10 times an hour wow!
gold cutier: ability to redeem other people's unspent cutes and spend them yourself
platinum cutier: all your posts emit music of your choice which gets louder and louder the closer people scroll towards your posts. ode to joy automatically plays for every online user whenever you post.
<<cutey council approves of this proposal>>


(https://i.imgur.com/LEM2FLI.jpg)


do news posts appear in all bold for everyone or is it just this theme

theyre kinda hard to read like this

update: still bold,,, what teh heck
response: press ctrl+f5


(http://167.88.165.30/old/Themes/Curve_Multi_Color/images/smflogo.png)


also, newsposts aren't bolded in the skin i'm using, no
yeah not bolded here either (curvemulticolor)
i think it's a core theme thing


i made this post with an observation about gross irl randos and their gnarly bathroom hygiene but it keeps popping up in the news and i dont want to be reminded of it every 14th time i refresh the page. post redacted.


the penny arcade guy writing nutso long paragraphs about undertale is funnier to me now that i know his real name is jerry, like it was foretold


funny joke: set ur gender marker on an internet profile as [something]kin or that attack helicopter meme

it makes u very cool and original


ive never even seen someone legitimately id as otherkin or whatever, the only times i ever see it are people shitting on trans people


The akward moment when you pick a very expensive restaurant from coinmap.org, invite a girl, talk about bitcoin all dinner long and finally it's time to pay but they say they don't accept bitcoin anymore, that makes me a sad panda


volceloid


The Steam store requirements put it at 4GB storage space.
On a related note, that makes The Witness one of the most expensive games, when you rank it in relation to its storage size: 10$ for 1 GB! To put that into perspective: For those same 10$ you get a 32 GB flash drive off Amazon.


In my whole life I've never actually owned a pet that gave birth (all of our dogs are male and the one female, bless your soul Peggy, didn't really want to "hit it on"). Even the dogs of my grandparents' place never had puppies. I only hear from my other relative, one of my aunts, and she has dealt with pets giving birth thrice.

So I've been wondering how it feels like being a pet owner who has their companion pregnant and then going to labor. Curious especially on other animals like cats and even birds - do bird owners even let their birds mate?

I know for a fact that generally people neuter their pets, but still, there are those who do want their pets to give birth, so I kinda wonder the experience - how the owner should respond, etc.


(https://i.imgur.com/Dbn84ca.gif)

me irl


stop removing the chuckle brothers picture


(http://99gifs.com/-img/52b8fcea1605fb3ef900000c.gif?w=400&h=298)


remember the days when the 167.88.165.30/old had a goatse emoticon (about 1 and a half weeks ago)


:ralph: <---- please fix this syl


(https://images.eurogamer.net/2015/articles/1/8/0/3/6/5/4/ellie-gibson-on-manual-stimulation-145208544975.jpg)


PYF chucklepics


someone post something. ducko post more loss dot jpegs.


whaaaat ducko is the perpetrator of the loss's?!

i thought for sure it was cait........


EVEN MY IMMEDIATE FAMILY THOUGHT IT WAS ME

and tbh i would have thought it was me if i didn't know it wasn't


Nice!


i figured there were multiple loss posters. i posted saying i was gonna post every loss comic i see in the news, but then i only posted like two


normally when you want to spam the penis arm picture in the news, you click the "click here to add another item" link and then press and hold enter to create a bunch of news item boxes. however if you load the news page while already holding enter, you can just click the button and itll start creating the boxes automatically, saving half an enter press


i posted one loss i think, but it was the one where its in reverse and ethans leaving the hospital with the baby so its kinda the opposite of a loss.jpg


penisarm postin' in multiple simultaneous dimensions


we miss you chuck, composer for the residents


MyLittleBButtonsis a proactive MLP:FiM art community with a focus on the 'ponies with belly buttons'


i decided to visit the temphc while the cuteyzone was stuck in an infinity loop

youll never guess what happened next!


was q there


Q WAS THERE


(https://i.imgur.com/LUxX7tK.jpg)


goty list 2016

the witness
that new zelda if it comes out
super bogus world 2 (delayed to 2017)
idk thats probably it nothing else is happening this year


oh maybe starfox??? if youre into that thing???


cuteyzone premium idea

trade in 100 cutes to ban any member. cons: you can't ban cuteyzone members. pros: you can ban anyone on any other forum.


cuteyzone premium idea

image recognition software to block out any spiders and/or arms.
alternatively, software to add spiders and/or arms to any picture.


cuteyzone premium idea

disable newspost hiding and randomly generate different id tag names on every refresh. buy premium to restore original functionality.


she was a lot like you. maybe not quite as hebi.


confession time: i know what im supposed to be looking for but i still cant see the penis

thats what she said

imo it looks like a big uncircumcised penis viewed from underneath if that helps


psst cook cant see this


newspost's are good :banana:


(https://40.media.tumblr.com/5622c915af9ed6116e20b322a50a7f8a/tumblr_inline_o1wjzuwU941qb55ta_540.png)


I don’t know why he’s painting that picture, but the reality is that anything that was spent in a bar or restaurant was very reasonable in nature when you look at any business, including video game companies. It was part of our operating budget, it’s not anything that was excessive. It was all reported to the IRS. The picture he’s painting about that is 100 percent bull****.


(https://40.media.tumblr.com/d1354455798ccf14e553eddcd61ed578/tumblr_o0sop5ncSp1rr5t33o1_1280.png)


loss.jpgs okay but i think you gotta be really original with your edit now for it to work for me these days

see: gain.jpg, that steven universe edit, strangle.mov (not actually a loss.jpg thing at all but its the funnier storyline to edit imo)


*sits a throne scrutinising every loss dot jaypeg offered before me*
*squints*
guards, behead this heathen and their meagre offering


pee and buppycat


Trophy hunting is a way of playing a game lots of people enjoy, myself included. I like the process and feeling of completing certain events to earn trophies just as much as I like 'playing' the game.

So when I see this game has 5 trophies I assume that it will be a game that doesn't require collecting, doing certain things a certain way, or requiring any type of planning and execution. You just play. For me, that isn't that appealing. I would be just as happy watching someone do a lets play on this.


im seriously toying with the idea of one day making a steam game where you can only get a certain number of achievements (others become inaccessible as you unlock them)


hey steam gamers, it's me, the game dev, and im here to say u should greenlight my new game, "this is the game where you can't get all the achievements" (gets booed off the internet)


im all for the idea, but peoplell just use steam achievement manager and post TUHMBS DOWN USE STEAM ACHIEVMENT MNANGER AND GET A REFUNED DONT GIVE THIS CHARLATAIN UR MONEY reviews en masse


GOODERS WATCH

i think i saw gooders irl earlier. more as the situation develops.


heres an eyewitness report "i saw a guy what looked like gooders but i was in a car and i didnt want to get out of the car and also didnt want to beep in case it wasnt gooders but im pretty sure it was gooders. maybe i should ask him. i havent talked to him in like 2+ years though so maybe i shouldn't" thank you eye witness. back to you in the studio.


i made those newsposts and then gooders appeared on the forum. coincidence.... or conspiracy?


yeah i thought that was pretty suspicious


idunno what did i look like


(https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/2539331/1346445882555.jpg)


[img title=Epic fail! Bird loses to itself at a childrens game]https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/2539331/1346426189987.png[/img]


im the bird
(always true)


Sorry, your majesty, but our contract says that Kracko can't be sent backo! HA HA!!


@ gooders, it was a tuesday morning. the suspected you was wearing a black hoodie i think, and crossed a road, possibly with the intention of getting to the other side.


missed connections

to the dark haired hottie in the hoodie crossing a road. i wanted to talk but i was too in a car. we should post on the same forum sometime


i just heard about a thing called sounding

*thousand yard stare*


dcco is here in teh news


was the kirbanime good


i never saw much of it but it was definitely goofy


(https://i.imgur.com/qPZMun9.jpg)


i thought i posted a pic in the news earlier but its not here and i now i can't remember if i even posted it or what it was


@carperson I wear a double breasted coat at the moment cos of the cold, so it probably wasn't me :c


CUTE FAX:
Bumblebees don't have a waggle dance like honeybees. Instead, when they get back from a successful run, they run around excitedly and get the other workers hyped to go forage.


the rogue newsposter Carper Son


the only xfiles episode ive ever seen is "mulder and scully meet the were-monster" and i intend to keep it that way


not because i didnt like it, it fuckin owned, but i just know that's got to be the peak and everything else will just be a disappointment


(https://i.imgur.com/N1ggb4J.jpg)


i came across somebody on reddit who writes and acts incredibly similarly to a user here and it's a little bizarre.


which user, u gotta name names

alternatively which reddit person


was it Guest


it was cait, but i don't want to say the reddit person because it'd be embarassing if i were wrong


(i dont post on reddit ever so it's def not me)


my posting style is 95% cribbed from some other obscure forum, so its p likely it was one of those folks you saw tho. i think a few of them post on reddit.


that makes sense then


dont post in the news asshole, it's no posting week.


the news has an asshole now?


yes, but dont post in it


poastse


i was going to replace the musicembeds with a different one but it didn't work so i just give up

- ungrand dad


posting makes me feel bad, please advise


actually its more how everyone posts around each other barely acknowledging anyone else, thats what feels bad


i wanna post more but i dont know what to add to a discussion a lot of the time without it sounding hollow and when i do post it feels bad so


maybe no posting week is the solution


petition to bring back q. now THERE'S a poster.


what if someone just copied all his posts over from the temphc and all our posts over there, like a carrier pigeon service.

i think this is the way forward


the new lemon demon album's out now, so i could start posting lyrics if it makes anyone feel better about his absence


rip wander over yonder :(
   


strawpoll: does the cute points system make you more or less likely to post

more likely: 0
less likely: 3
neither: 4


We will find your logo


for once i remembered to mute before checking the news so that the loud flintstones music doesnt kill me


April 17th:
The End of The Cutey Zone


(https://40.media.tumblr.com/a43625a377a48cba77ed6cbb14eae55e/tumblr_o4p8epC7fy1r5pvhjo1_540.jpg)
color blindness test


youll have a gay old time.


all i can see are coloured dots. does this mean i'm colourblind


giivasunner is good


Hitting this Block for 416 Years Crashes Paper Mario


i just remembered an old comic i made back in the day (the invisibility spell one) and its still incredibly funny to me but i think it might be unwoke now. i dont want to get cancelled.


(https://i.imgur.com/f3BlCti.jpg?1)


ok but technically does it even crash paper mario, i thought it just made the game lag really bad to the point where it can take several seconds or even minutes to render a single frame..... i guess maybe u could run out of memory from too many blocks or something???? idk i didnt watch the whole thing


david bowie, wander over yonder and giivasunner rip, fuck 2016


Question for anyone who plays Temp HC but never Perm HC

Does anyone have a good two handed sword getting dusty in perm hc that they are not using? It's been a 2 year quest for me to try to find/buy/craft one better than 540 pdps, the highest I ever found was a 576 one that dropped randomly in closed beta for awakening and got wiped. I've played most all temp hc leagues and never been able to get one over 540 pdps. This week I spent all my remaining money in THC on crafting and still failed.

If anyone has a good one that is just collecting dust in permanent hc I'd be happy to pay the 20 exalts I have stashed there uselessly .

Thanks


wow i just saw what the colorblind test was...... thanks nerds


sjws only


9gagman style


gamers only


romeo and juliet but instead of the two conflicting families its sjws and gamers


im not the loss poster but heres a good one that isnt just 4 panels of abstract shapes

(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Cg9XXXaWIAAV8-3.jpg:large)


james cameron's fern gully except the l'cie are gamers and the humans are sjws pretending to be gamers to infiltrate them (in the end one of them gives up their sjw form to become a gamer for real and fight back against the sjws)


i dont think there was a true loss poster, but i have become the loss poster

Quote

james cameron's fern gully except the l'cie are gamers and the humans are sjws pretending to be gamers to infiltrate them (in the end one of them gives up their sjw form to become a gamer for real and fight back against the sjws)

where does the musical number about vore fall into this


I'm the guy who trained his girlfriends dog to be a nazi and I'm currently being smeared in the papers. I have made a post explaining what happened and showing just how much the media twisted the whole thing.


real life dril post


here's a list of nazi dogs i want to have as a Mom someday & here is a copy of that list in case you accidentally throw it in the gabarge


humoresque of a nazi dog


who let the nazi dogs out


nazi dog planet


i did nazi dog coming


Super Jehovah's Witness (SJW)


(https://67.media.tumblr.com/f26c8734024223d1289377bb02d782b0/tumblr_o03mnnPkfB1syqltto1_500.png)


(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B4x1qqXCAAAvzvA.jpg)


turd man pic 2


turd man pic


My friends where need a map to nayru's temple, and maybe by the look of thing, maybe dokof on the way to din's temple.


up and down and up and down
left and right to left and right


uncharted 4 spoilers

(https://i.imgur.com/sPoBp9P.jpg)

guybrush threepwood is an important historical figure in The Lore and appears multiple times


a comic starting by showing one figure where the next two panels have two figures, culminating in one figure next to another one lying down


im bored of loss. maybe i'll start, i dunno, gain posting? maybe i could find edits of tom preston comics

- the loss poster who wasnt actually the lost poster but took up the mantle because nobody else did


i could post comics about fascist dogs but i do nazi the point


Got called racist in Greggs earlier lads


were you being racist in greggs


i sort of understand the news post about everybody posting around each other now

sad :(
   


ducko should post some long paragraphs about cartoons or something.

i would read them. i cant believe he barely even managed one about jojo.


im sorry if my bad jojoke killed off any chance of more joposts


i really like hearing other people talk about shows i havent seen, esp anime, because it feels like experiencing it thru the prism of someone else + filling in the gaps with my imagination is usually a vastly more enjoyable and efficient experience than actually watching all 200000 episodes of whatever


(https://images-2.discordapp.net/.eJwNysENwyAMAMBdGAAbCLWVbRChgJTECNxX1d2be9_XfOZpdtNUx9oBjr6yzMMulZlqsVWkniWNvmyWC5Jqyu0qty5w3iEG73ljjOEVicBx8JE2JsYHE0Zoz039PUux467m9wduIiPY.JsogLlJQ7iiQp2l9tnb-c48OVLY.png)

Quote

i really like hearing other people talk about shows i havent seen, esp anime, because it feels like experiencing it thru the prism of someone else + filling in the gaps with my imagination is usually a vastly more enjoyable and efficient experience than actually watching all 200000 episodes of whatever

SAME as a kid i'd spend more time reading synopsises  online than ever actually watching anything lol

im glad i picked up that habit because it can be a good time saver when you want to know what a series is all about, but the series itself is clearly terrible

jojos isnt terrible though, i actually watched that and love it personally, im just curious what ducko thinks


the two steven universe eps they aired early in france are peak gay and it owns


i once made a high quality videogame rip and then giivasunner did the exact same one with the exact same jig but not as good as mine (it was the calling from twewy one)

Lawful SJW	Neutral SJW	Chaotic SJW
Lawful Neutral	True Neutral	Chaotic Neutral
Lawful Gamer	Neutral Gamer	Chaotic Gamer

(https://67.media.tumblr.com/a7812ab9bb56b4120a0b54c54b56d3c4/tumblr_o3t925GoPo1r89qoso1_400.jpg)


(https://66.media.tumblr.com/4efbc2a330dbcd68f0ff23b651c0e5b3/tumblr_o3t925GoPo1r89qoso3_500.jpg)


(https://66.media.tumblr.com/53e961eeadc746129bcab8454f2acf3f/tumblr_o3t925GoPo1r89qoso2_500.png)

Title: Re: News Purge: 2020-09-25
Post by: SquareWheel on September 25, 2020, 03:13:07 AM

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Cj3RMX8WUAA0FiJ.jpg:large)


Is it me, or people is starting to treat straight people the same way gay people used to be treated before?


Draco asks Harry to use his position as Head of Magical Law Enforcement at the Ministry of Magic to shut down gossip that a Time-Turner was used to allow Voldemort to impregnate Astoria, Draco’s wife, who gave birth to Scorpius.


we are gamers


But why not have a female Link in this big new game? “You know there’s the idea of the Triforce in the Zelda games we make,” he told Kotaku. “The Triforce is made up of Princess Zelda, Ganon and Link. Princess Zelda is obviously female. If we made Link a female we thought that would mess with the balance of the Triforce. That’s why we decided not to do it.”


dont order anything from base.com they're slow and shitty and write contrary reviews if u talk about them on review sites just a heads up


ive never heard of base.com but im gonna buy something from them right away thanks for the advertising, fellow newsposter!!! <---- it's me, im posting this right here and now to save you the effort


Cutey No Zone
"It's Better Than Nothing"


(https://i.imgur.com/WeinKyX.jpg)


briefly considered resizing that pic, didnt.


(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Cmps95dW8AAXX7U.jpg)


when did notch turn into such a big fuckin pile of edgy shit, i just stumbled upon him being a rancid garbage person to a couple of different game devs


like just look at this

https://twitter.com/Jonathan_Blow/status/750113063936794624

he used to seem p chill and modest what the hell happened


apart from gettin fuckin rich and moving to live in a bubble with other rich people ofc. but that still doesnt feel like it explains everything


even his twitter profile is basically about how he's just an argumentative rando now, but with some twee "i might be rude but i still love u :)" line while he rants about SJWS and VIRTUE SIGNALLING whenever someone says "wow e3 sure has a lot of neckstabs"


notch is what happens when a 4chan user becomes a billionaire


also what's a neckstab?

------Add your answers below as you see this news post while browsing the forum!------


its when u middle click a bunch of links when ur browsing the internet and when ur done looking at one page you go look at teh NECKS TAB


If you insist on your artistic vision, at least make it optional.


oh apparently somebody just got stabbed in the neck in a video game. i figured it was some new term i wasnt aware of

news: Somebody Gets Stabbed In The Neck In A Video Game


I'm lonely.


Cherish the Chuckle Brothers? Treasure the To Mes and the To Yous? Proselytise the Penisarm posts? Then download the Chuckle Brothers app


Optional extra: Pay 99p to hear the C Bros say the f word


Penisharmed by the Penisarm
Turned away by the phantasmagoric manifestation of a large willy protruding from a cocktail glass

by Chuckle Tingle


it's the nut shack


(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CnHAJNxVYAAmfyI.jpg)


it's the

nut shack


~Weclome to SHOP 'n SAVE, the just right Place to Be!~


videogames in tyool 2016 that are good
stephens sausage roll
the witness
tokyo mirage sessions hashtag fire emblem
zero time dilemma
hubols bogus thing probably

2016 games that suck and blow
inside
probably some others too


sgdq 2016 speedruns that are good
the jak one
the lbp one
the mario makers one
idk i didnt watch any others please suggest some thanks in advance


hey gamers


Praise Jesus! #blessed


I really wish this show was not on Cartoon Network. If it was a Netflix show they could have Steven grow up to be an adult. But this being CN he'll prob get to 14-15 and he won't go any farther. Also if this show was on Netflix they could get so much more violent and the story telling could get so much deeper and complex. Why why must this show be chained to CN?!? WHYYYYY


(https://i.imgur.com/uISG9wM.png)
strokémon


someone had a life is strange tshirt at the olympics *listens to entire lis soundtrack again* life is good


callout post @ my bad internet

fuck u, u piece of unstable shit


[musicembed]

[/musicembed]


(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CqUCU-NUEAA88xQ.jpg)


(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CqZw5FpWAAERdPt.jpg)

obductions a good game, buy obduction if you like good games.

that's the flintstones theme. i know because i watched the flintstones film in school with my friend barney. that's not sonic music.


ignore the newspost where i said steven universe had hit peak gay because it somehow got even gayer and its incredible


rt if ur also awake at 5am because a horse keeps neighing outside ur house


wheres ducko gone


shortly after i made that post, ducko showed up


the real question is where are dabomstew lord_tomahawk jumper2themax nephiros shanko n00b poo(banned member) mitchellXD catkilller7 and yomamasmama

update: we found mitchellxd


screenshot of a court document:
(https://i.imgur.com/6b9V1Rf.png)


That's because I'm not the generic YouTube commenter. I actually do conversation and reason instead of mindless blurts.?


Clinton came loaded with facts and figures on the economy and crime. But she also overdid it on the pandering front – the worst moment being a passage in which she defended America’s first black president, all but branded Trump a racist landlord, and then circled back to the glorious oratory of Michelle Obama at her party’s convention.

At least she didn’t break out into “We Shall Overcome.”


the nutshack theme but the first nutshack is replaced with me ending the channel


my claim to fame is being the 77th subscriber to the original giivasunner channel


list of good things to come out of the year 2016 other than giivasunner:
- flip flappers


uh oh u friccin moron


I Identify as a Redditor. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of browsing over the internet and reposting transphobic "memes" and racist jokes. People say to me that an emotionally mature, intelligent person being a redditor is impossible but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a neurosurgeon remove my ability to feel empathy for other people. From now on I want you guys to call me "Redditor" and respect my right to belittle people who are different than me. If you can't accept me you're an SJW and need to learn how to take a joke. Thank you for being so understanding.


temphc's been down for 24 hours :(
   


who care's


get hype for an untitled story jape


happy rebecca black - friday


(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Cyhm-0qUkAAdMC3.jpg)


do you still read the news??? plz post w/ ur answer


no


that's too bad. sometimes these decisions have to be made though, i understand.


Game Theory: Princess Peach is BI???? *footage of her kissing toadette in super mario run*


here's the official cutey . zone gotys of the year

1. let it die
2. the witness
3. stephens sausage roll
4. aimainas new game
5. tokyo mirage sessions
6. nier 2 demo
late entry 7: phoenix wrights spirits of justice

thats it. nice. see you all next year!


make america hate again


Here’s a thing that happened to one of my friends. I was there.

Basically, we were walking down the sidewalk, talking about something meaningless. I think it had to do with a movie. Then this bus screeches up, stops next to us, and a bunch of people with “Down with Nazis” shirts climbed out and started beating him up. I was punched and kicked a bit too, but I managed to avoid brutalization by going for their faces. After figuring out what’s happening, I started attacking them back, getting them off of him. He was quite injured but I called 911 and he made a full recovery at the hospital. I was fine, with only a cut on my arm that they patched up.


(https://i.imgur.com/7Tl3s0P.png)

biss


punch nazis errday


(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C2vFyoYVQAA1u0Y.jpg)
(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C2t549MUUAAMzQX.jpg:large)


punch notch


    Big brother smirked, “Facts are whatever I say they are. For example, trains are small. Really small. You could fit a train in the palm of your hand.”

    “That’s not true,” spluttered Winston. “I was on a train yesterday. It’s the biggest damn thing I’d ever seen.”

    “No!” boomed Big Brother. “It was small! Welcome to Tiny Train World, Winston. Enjoy not being able to catch a train on account of their being too small, you idiot!”


(https://1.bp.blogspot.com/_hDbMKlEahVk/Sj-NbW0-LaI/AAAAAAAAAHs/ynXNa-49kvU/s400/2009-05-27+18.09.12.jpg)


(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C7pALUrXgAQAHR8.jpg:large)


i, ducko, have finally learned how to use the news.......


im glad that powerup comics is still referencing lore i created


entered a vgm music quiz and the creator said they recognised my name from the Matt Makes Games forum


and that creator's name was MitchellXD


JAM SOCIALISTS WIN


powerup just out of nowhere tweeted an old guest comic i made. im glad. im glad i have a legacy on the onlines.


news


tfw u facebook stalk ur old schoolfriends and theyre all more successful than u, but also look like 10 years older than u


"i work at a well known games studio"
"im planning a high speed rail link"
"im a popular musician"
yeah well guess what fuckos, i *spends like 5 minutes thinking about it* have a lot of very successful friends who i dont keep in touch with any more.


wow i havent checked the news in a while hallo


yo


tfw u see a goatse and it doesn't really phase u


i spent years avoidin the ol goatman but now it just seems delightfully quaint


seeing that goatse is like a warm damp loving embrace


those donald trump news posts were probably a lot funnier about a year ago


speaking of goates heres my gotys 2017 in no particular order

nier automata
mario's odyssey
danganronpa v3
mario + rabbids
the zeld
probably some others idk
oh yeah opus magnum was p good

LATE ADDITIONS
quern p good its like a cross between myst and a traditional adventure game
also lifey strange fuckin owns and i love it


i would fucking love it if people would stop replying to things online with gifs as if they were funny or relevant fuck off


and fuck tapatalk


how's the news these days


i'm strapped for cash so the only game i played this year that came out this year was doki doki literature club. i guess my game of the year is chrono trigger.


(https://i.imgur.com/WhMJZd9.png)


(https://i.imgur.com/QDSHeQf.png)


(https://i.imgur.com/T2Ds1nQ.jpg)


i love u all!!!!!!!!!!!


(https://i.imgur.com/nBa0sYn.png)


shoutout to whoever posted the capy with the bunny, nice to see new capys in the news


(https://i.imgur.com/iXIorjO.png)

"I'm sure there'll be an explanation for this."


Getting Over It With Matthew Thorson


(https://i.imgur.com/m8xwNYv.png)


i really dislike the 4b track in celeste and it's the only track i don't love so it's super weird that everyone else seems to list is as one of their favs

i dont understand????? it literally hurts me to listen to it?????


5bs track is soo fu*kin good tho


nusty


jesus christ it's a lion get in the car

>:3


isn sprite is egg


RIck and Morty is fuggin' hilarious. The nihilistic, bleak outlook is accentuated perfectly by the crude humor. Just because you don't "get it" doesn't mean it's bad.

What the hell is wrong with me? No sir, what the hell is wrong with you?

Edit - also, Mr Poopy Butthole is one of the saddest characters in a cartoon I've ever seen. Like, legit, I could get teary-eyed thinking about him for too long.


it doesn't make a bit of difference guys, the balls are inert


*glomp*


[gutsmans ass sound effect]


insert zeeky boogy doog here


i was watching tv and they played a track that appears in life is strange and then i clicked onto my favourite internet forum in the world (the cutey zone) and the random news post i got was a life is strange related one

life is....
weird


i hope q's ok he's been awol from the net since the end of last year.


cartoon reviews
apple & onion: b+ p good would watch another 10 ep series

scoobernatural: the scooby parts were good the live action stuff was cheap and nasty b+

ducktales: salright b+


if youre reading this and ur gay and or have gender feelings please play butterfly soup its so good


oh jeez i went back and checked this place just in time for The End Of The Cutey Zone in 6 days apparently


(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DW5chK6XkAI3yjs.jpg)


just thinking about how good ratchet and clank 1 is and how suck ass of a game the remake is
~the ps2 ratchet and clank liker


buy the videogame that is called yakuza 0 it is very good


(https://images.eurogamer.net/2015/articles/1/8/0/3/6/5/4/ellie-gibson-on-manual-stimulation-145208544975.jpg)


what is ducko up to these days?


also, i found out quakster is still posting on the georgedrome, so he is probably at least somewhat alright


thats good news, im glad. and wow the georgedrome is still going huh.

and wait.... gucc's been keeping quakster all to themselves and didn't think to let us know??????? i can't believe this


ALSO LET IT BE KNOWN THAT I, THE PENISARM POSTER HAVE REPENTED FOR MY PENISARM POSTING WAYS AND THE MOST RECENT ATTEMPT WAS NOT ME


(https://i.imgur.com/ReG8FzL.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/jcV6IbS.png)


(https://i.imgur.com/Jpv4KLr.png)


(https://i.imgur.com/uWXsEzX.png)


official campaign to rescue q from the georgedrome and drag him back here


im reading old news posts and wow some of these are relaly old. my life has changed so much and also not enough since i posted some of these and it's wild to see things that feel more recent actually happened in a totally different phase of my life ha ha *plays to videoge*

i made this


(https://1.bp.blogspot.com/_64jRVt1CleE/S-ohOPawAlI/AAAAAAAANbg/LQ9WBHcEiEY/s1600/Nancy-bondage.jpg)


(https://i.imgur.com/DZWanY4.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/1EQMCf2.png)
(https://i.imgur.com/OVryYKh.png)

crap shit dumbledore


yo arkatox posted this on the georgedrome two (2!) years ago

I'm sorry. I was 12. I was naïve. I was stupid. I reacted to everything wrong. I victimized myself because I genuinely thought I was a victim. I was incredibly homophobic. I was experiencing a whole new side to the world and I had absolutely no idea how to respond.

I can't pretend it was all my fault—I was genuinely cyberbullied—but a huge part of it was, and for that I am truly sorry.

A heartfelt apology to Alex and especially Gooders for how I treated you guys for your sexual orientation. I feel like Alex and I made out up years ago, but I'm also sure I said some pretty hurtful things that I don't even remember.

Basically, what I'm saying, is that I'm a completely different person. My views and perspectives have changed on pretty much about everything. I've grown up.

I don't know who all is going to see this, or even if anyone is, but I wasn't sure where else to post this that the most relevant people would see. A number of you already know that I've matured to an extent, but I figured I'd come out and make a statement for the rest. Really, though, if this much time passed and I didn't mature, that'd be pretty screwed up.

So yup. Genuinely sorry and wishing I could go back in time and punch my past self.

And to anyone who decides to reply with a douchebag comment, a heartfelt fuck you. Wink

With love,
Reuben


^^^ tahts some good character development im glad arkie's cool now


sig & avvy thread 2018 edition

(https://i.redd.it/65o06s388po01.jpg)


its me again, the reaction gif hater here to say

i hope everyone who posts reaction gifs and makes every twitter thread fucking unreadable falls under a mining truck. seeing annoying 2 second loops constantly when i just want to read bad hot takes makes me actually physically sick on account of the synethesia and i cant do anything to stop it short of making a twitter account myself and disabling autoplay in the settings which im not going to do because a) fuck twitter im not registering an account with them and b) i still have to scroll past a million irrelevant tweets of like a cartoon character mouthing something unsubtitled or someone from ru paul blinking or whatever the fuck god im pissed off


*someone mentions pop team epic* OH I JUTS DID A GIF SEARCH FOR POP TEAM EPIC AND HERES ONE!!! ITS A GIF FROM POP TEAM EPIC BUT NOT THE SCENE ANYONES TALKING ABOUT RN!!! IM CONTRIBUTIONG TO THE CONFVERATSTION

Title: Re: News Purge: 2020-09-25
Post by: SquareWheel on September 25, 2020, 03:13:10 AM

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

oh i can also disable firefox's autoplay media option in the about config but that breaks youtube and every other fucking site and all because i dont want to see a flashing pikachu as i scroll down a webpage like it's the year 2005 when epilepsylol was the height of newgrounds comedy


this shit ass garbage world fucking blows and if i could choose between a timeline where trump never got elected and a timeline where nobody posted reaction gifs, id like both actually


google is proud to sponsor pride *immediately begins their pride video with a notice that it was filmed with a google phone* *demonetises lgbtq videos* *advertises anti-lgbtq orgs over said videos*


this is the official loss discussion zone right? i heard recently that for some reason buckley updated loss, changed the title to "found", and changed ethans expression so he is smiling in the last panel. does anyone know what the fuck is the deal with that


i think buckley's trying to get in front of the meme and be all "haha yeah i get it im in on it too" but instead comes across even weirder and creepier because actually he is not in on the joke.


i appreciate people who leave rude comments for the weekend writer on rockpapershotgun dot com

brock wilbur is a bad writer i wish he would stop writing for rock paper shotgun dot com


the loss thing would have been funny without him changing the name of the comic, like buckley is just staring at you going "haha you looked up the original lost. i see what you're doing here"

but once again, buckley is ruined by trying too hard and ending up using too many words (any at all)


brick welber update, someone wrote a mean comment about his writing, and i responded to agree and to zone in specifically on a single aspect of his writing that really pisses me off

im pleased to announce that even tho both those comments got deleted and brad williker's writing is still awful word salad, he seems to have stopped doing the one thing i mentioned he keeps doing in the comment i left so mission... mission accomplished, right guys? (thats the thing he kept doing)


love 2 want 2 make a small metroidvania but cant be bothered making any art assets and therefore cant be bothered doing any programming with programmer art


id be more inclined to make things if i had the guts to show them to more than like, 2 people. i dont want to put anything on the internet for randos but i dont want to make something for nobody but myself. i dont want people to be mean about a game i make, but i even moreso dont want people to be fans of it and me by extension because the internet seems to make fans of things think the creator is now their friend and employee


dont want 2 have any number of teens and socially awkward adults yes anding my every post on the internet and failing to understand jokes and irony

but id also feel like a failure if i didnt get anyone doing that at all either

only option is not to do anything


i think loss -> found is a shitty title change anyway. found isn't an antonym of loss. find? sure. gain? yeah. found is just ol' timmy putting the bare minimum of thought and effort into showing how much he too enjoys the loss meme and how much it doesn't bother him.


ea and square's e3 confs were p bad

mikesoft's was ok tho


i can make some metroidvania art for u. what kind of art do u need. oh but it has to be low detail 16x16 pixel art


thanks for the offer but the art things mostly me just making excuses not to do it i think.

like ive made a dialogue system and then remade it before writing a single line of actual gameplay code so id feel bad if i asked someone else to make art and ended up abandoning the game at the first hurdle

kinda feel like i should just bite the bullet and make something with placeholder megaman sprites or w/e for now until i have an actual game i dont feel bad about commissioning art for


(https://i.imgur.com/wd5FEPF.jpg)


ive found that a good tactic for finding games you like is to look at the negative reviews

for example, i looked at the negative reviews for hollow knight and they were all "the map's useless it doesn't tell you where you are" (this isn't true you can buy something early on to """fix""" this and im not buying it) and "it's really aimless it doesn't tell you were to go at all" and im like hell yeah that's my jam actually.


im also playing strange journey redux and every time the game puts down a trapdoor or a one way door that sets me back 20 minutes or i follow a long path of nothing but poison tiles and there's just a dead end with not even a treasure chest and i have to walk all the way back i just get the biggest grin on my face i fucking love malevolent game design


anyway what im saying is if everyone likes your game and nobody's angry at you for any of your design decisions, sorry, you fucked up, ur game's shit actually.


super paper mario can do one though. making you walk down an empty literally blank environment for 10 minutes is boring. if ur gonna fuck with ur player, put some effort into it.

merlee's mansion still owns.


warp points are a failure of game design. dark souls turns to shit once you can fast travel between bonfires. if ur gonna have fast travel make it inconvenient. sorry i dont make the rules.


here's a question for yall. should games have an easy mode. or rather should everyone be allowed to beat every game.

im not saying this in an elitist way. im just not entirely on board with the idea a game should make itself accessible if it goes against the themes of the game.

like should the sans boss fight give you an easy mode option if you die too many times. should bloodborne let u skip father gascoigngenenfghe (actually yes on this one im stuck)?

i hear people say "well movies dont refuse to play and books dont let you flip pages if youre not good enough at watching/reading them" and no fuckin shit they dont, the act of you turning pages or keeping ur eyeballs fixed on the screen isn't an inherent part of the narrative of either of those things, whereas the actions that arise from ur inputs can be.

anyway let me know ur opinion here in the cutey dot zone news


like i am absolutely for options that make a game easier if it helps people but theres a point where it can harm the narrative ur telling

like everyone rightly dunks on david cage and his bullshit when his plot involves "freeing" the robot who sits on your menu screen, and then proceeds to offer and option to get an identical replacement in a post release patch because people asked for it.

and just to go back to the sans analogy, it's basically the same thing to be all "i know what youre doing player. youre dangerous and i gotta stop u no matter what it takes" *player dies 3 times* "ok u wanna flick to easy mode now? y/n?"


ofc a mario or whatever letting you skip levels you can't beat is cool with me and i dont know why people got/still get mad about that.


oh also re: the undertale thing, the kill everyone player is actively choosing to do something that goes against the themes of the game so of course they should have a bad time. i think maybe peace/neutral route undertale should give the option for easier battles tho, like have it in universe as one of the characters youve befriended helping you not die to metaton. that would also fit with the themes of the game.


im going to give the boring but objectively correct answer of "depends on the game and the context"


thats my opinion about every game design question actually. are blind jumps in platformers a design mistake? "depends on the game and the context"

would it be a good idea for a game to ignore ~10% of all player inputs at random? "depends on the game and the context"


yeah

im just kind of venting because ive seen a few youtube video essayists acting like if it's not possible for everybody to eventually beat ur game or if you dont afford them luxuries like maps and frequent save points that ur game's objectively bad, and people parrotting that.

and the people who disagree tend to be disagreeing for imo the wrong reasons ("get gud scrub. casuals are trying to ruin games") and i dont want to argue with any of them because i dont want to get into internet arguments over computer screen button toys.


fast travel is still a failure of game design tho.


i just had a cool idea what if instead of instantaneous teleportation in breath of the wild, you could only zip to places you could see with your binoculars + that you'd activated as warp points in the usual way. obv that would require a slight rework of the world (maybe have shrines project a beacon or something once youve been to them) but i think itd be cool if you have to plan a route to a place and navigate to vantage points to find your next warp point instead of just opening up your map and appearing on the other side of the world. hire me nintendo.


her: what are you thinking about
me: nothing
my brain: the khakain rebellion is an important event in the helix community lore


hollow knight is very good thanks for the recommendation cookinater


i made a game recently with fast travel.... i actually didnt add it until the entire map was designed but i added it because there are lots of one-way passages (a few of which are "traps" in the sense that you might take them by accident) and it was often very inconvenient and roundabout to get back to a particular area if you want to explore it some more. its a non-linear game but it has a lot of linear sections that are pretty tedious to trundle through repeatedly, and fast travel lets you skip them after you have been through them once

i dont really dislike fast travel but i wonder if botw would have been more interesting without it. maybe the horses and stables would actually be useful (i think i used a horse once when it was tutorializing me about them and then i abandoned her in hateno village forever. her name was spotty because she had spots on her butt)


not to yuck anyones yums but steam just recommended an incredibly niche fetish rpg in my discovery queue "just to see if you like it" and no steam i don't


update: im playing the video game Dreams on the PlayStation 4 and i was looking for undertale muisic within it and there was an undertale/[this fetish game] crossover cover in the results. just wanted to keep you all updated on this. also siivagunner did a rip of it a while back.


it was a completely harmless fetish, like, but an incredibly specific one (forced latex goo monster furry transformation) and im not sure what prompted steam to suggest it in a queue that was otherwise a series of baseball games and call of duties


(https://i.imgur.com/TqtVQVy.png)

heres my personal forms of fast travel ranking list

teleport from anywhere to anywhere - fuck off
teleport from anywhere to set teleport points - ill allow it
teleport from teleport points to teleport points - slightly better
fast travel physically and diagetically moves you around the world fast (see yoko's island express) - good
no fast travel, unlockable/creatable shortcuts everywhere - the best and anybody who disagrees needs to meet me outside in the next 10 minutes

(im actually ok with a combination of teleport point to point movement and shortcuts, like hollow knight, and think thats the best but i think teleport points that are too frequent dilute the player's experience of the world and make the shortcuts unnecessary and therefore less fun to unlock. i think its important that players be allowed to learn how to navigate a game world without feeling like they should be using fast travel constantly.)


most sus thing in the world is people who put "cishet scum" or whatever in their twitter profiles

might as well just go the whole hog and add "softboy" and "my dms are open if u need a shoulder 2 cry on ;)" while ur at it


im one of the good ones. yes im CIS and het and white but i know those are bad things so u can trust me. anyway send me ur nudes. ha ha just kidding. other guys would say that for real but not me lol ;P


twitter is bad if this newspost gets enough likes im gonna shut twitter down


oh i thought self-describing as "cishet scum" or similar things was mostly an ironic anti-sjw thing, i didnt know softboys did it as some weird form of self-deprecation


i think its both. ive definitely seen people who do that stuff, and big themselves up as being Allies while yelling at queer people for describing themselves with the "problematic terms" bi, poly or nb.
theatrically yell at enough people, deserving or not, and youre a hero.


used to follow a couple of lps by someone who verbatim had the cishet scum thing in their twitter profile which i was always yeesh about even if i didn't know enough at the time to verbalise why. dropped them like a rock when they ran a counter-stream(? ? ?) protesting the release of one of christine love's games because it had a non-con kink scene on one of the routes.

yeah, let people know the scene's in there by all means (iirc there wasn't much of a warning at first but that got fixed soon after release) but fuck off using your position to try to deprive marginalised small time creators of income and harassing their supporters. especially when youve got no skin in the game yourself but really want enough Good Ally Points to trade for a cheeky shag.


oh speaking of softboys, watch out for that tetris video that keeps showing up in youtubes recommendeds. nearly clicked it myself before i noticed it was nick robinson trying to get back on the scene like nothing happened. creep.


lol sorry i keep posting about things im mad about itn (in the news) but theres a lot of stuff that really pisses me off and i either post it here for the two other folks wholl read it, or i start a twitter account for myself and immediately gain several billion more things to get mad about


things that dont make me mad:

the new three caballeros tv series that just appeared out of nowhere and is p good despite falling out of a portal from the 90s

the ducktales episodes where donald ducks in them

the mickey mouse shorts where donald ducks in them

quack pack


its ok i like reading your news post's......


thanks!!!


~? putting strangers on pedestals is bad and so is assuming the worst possible interpretation of anything well meaning people say ?~


cutey zone newpost conversations i missed roundup:

- i don't really like letting players skip levels in mario because i like the sense of accomplishment from overcoming challenges in video games and then when i can talk to somebody about the game and they can be like "oh yeah i beat the game too i skipped all the hard shit" and wow now instead of accomplished i feel like a dumbass for wasting my time trying hard levels over and over when i could have just skipped everything! when brawl came out i hated subspace emissary because i made myself beat it on impossible first try for no reason. anyway i actually agree with everyone else

- "teleport from teleport points to teleport points" is my favorite method of fast travel. "no fast travel, unlockable/creatable shortcuts everywhere" becomes an issue if the game has collectables and you get stuck looking for just one last little thing and have no idea where it is. doing that without fast travel is basically hellmode. in a smaller world or just a game with No Bullshit it's probably the best option though

- putting creators on a pedestal really is not good.


here are some bunnys from twitter account @bunnyfamily
(https://i.imgur.com/9vqOeGp.jpg)


(https://i.redditmedia.com/M3z3ZtY3HiOxNiI0uaUJFgKgVEImqabsmE8zdZqnOfs.jpg?w=1024&s=10b22f357277133fa53be73558cbadac)


(https://i.redditmedia.com/hOcUF0E-RlJbUB1rqZKvf9YHHOFriFL0vh6HqgwaynU.jpg?w=1024&s=94266f479728071ef9dc6251ad8ffb99)


(https://i.redditmedia.com/D-YdM5gZ8Go-VCOU2jyh1w9waprDuVcEpCwAov5G-A4.jpg?w=640&s=adcc4baef0d4e80be3aa4a2d49af37dc)


from @evo3183
(https://i.imgur.com/SSQbbR7.jpg)


(https://i.imgur.com/yOeEq4v.jpg)

(sorry i dont have credits for any of mine, im just grabbing them from a bunchat discord but theyre mostly from r/rabbits)


aww i didnt know there was an ogmo cameo in celeste. he looks really cute and squishy too

(if you didnt know either look up "celeste elevator shaft")


its a good easter egg i think the towerfalls are there too


i made this

made this too

decided to devote my life to making v specific and varyingly niche two things crossover edits and posting them unlisted to youtube where nobody will find them


just did another im unstoppable

(it is incredibly hard to move single frames around in adobe premiere so i dont even try to make lipsync match up. i dont know how youtube poopers do it.)


Siivagunner has posted an An Untitled Story rip!

Newsposter has decided to use the news to only earnestly post Cutey Zone and Helix Games Inc Related news now.


Please keep signatures under 300px tall, including text. See the Sig & Avvy Thread if you need help with this!


Get ready for Some Posting Week, active Sunday, July 15th to Saturday, July 21st! It'll be a fun romp you won't forget!


I'm officially registering my interest in participating in Some Posting Week. I will endeavour to post some.


(https://i.imgur.com/E6kOTII.png)

Title: Re: News Purge: 2020-09-25
Post by: SquareWheel on September 25, 2020, 03:13:13 AM

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

cactus block kicks asstus block. i haven't played it in years though but i always thought the basic concept was very good.


http://love-game.net/jumper/ i wrote this. i dont know if i should post it on my twitter or outside the news. i dont even know what it is, its like a j1 screenshot lp sandwiched between some video game ramblings that i stayed up all night writing because i was depressed & wanted to die


i enjoyed that, it was a really good read! had to switch to reader view though, the small white monospaced text on black bg was pretty hard on my eyes so id probably change it if you post it anywhere else

but yeah i enjoyed reading it and i think its definitely something other people would find interesting too.


thanks news poster..... i put it on my twiter


i enjoyed the article too! screenshot LPs are really like a lost but valuable artform, or something


dunno if any yall play that splatoon 2 but the octo expansion is incredibly good, and i say this as someone who bounced off 2's singleplayer mode (but loved the original's ???).

i heard that some breath of the wild people worked on it which makes sense, it feels like a pack of splatoon themed zelda shrines and i hope splatoon 3 picks up where this left off in terms of level design, tone and maybe the style of progression unless they do something cool + different again. its good and i only wish it was twice as long.


botw hot take

i think the game would be better if they got rid of most of the combat shrines, and they shuffled some of the puzzle shrines around to replace the empty room "reward" shrines.
i get that the challenge of the reward shrines comes from what you have to do just to get to them, but it just feels so unsatisfying. like a lot of the fun of the shrines to me is not knowing what's going to greet you after the loading screen so when it's just a staircase a treasure chest and an old person, its always a bummer. (and now that i think about it, the thang stations in spla2n are almost exactly the same setup in every way and are also a little bit a bummer but theres only 4 of em)

anyway ive spent a lot of time thinking about what the next botw-like zeld should do but maybe ill save it for some posting week......


i enjoyed exploring the overworld a lot more than doing shrines so after i while i just started activating shrines and then leaving them for later. when i eventually went back to clean up all the shrines i missed, i found the combat shrines to be a huge drag, and the reward shrines to be a huge relief because i didnt have to do anything (altho a lot of the rewards themselves were cool/powerful weapons which were kinda useless to me at that point) i guess if you like the puzzle shrines a lot it would be different but i thought they were just ok, i like zeldos for the exploring


(https://i.imgur.com/wOLs6Ae.png)


(https://i.imgur.com/0OuGAAb.png)


(https://i.imgur.com/krEcW8k.png)


(https://i.imgur.com/sWl53Tb.png)


q posted a comment on my utube video not too long ago


saw an elon musk stan calling his critics c**ts.

now elon musk has started calling the guy who actually helped those kids in thailand a pedo, said internet poster has reassessed their opinion and decided that anyone who disliked musk before they did is still a c**t.


if you dont like this sociopathic apartheid billionaire youre a bad person. *is presented with yet another reason to stop liking said billionaire* if you didn't like him before i stopped liking him you're a bad person.


just got mgs5, excited to hop in and see how big boss's story ends! wish me luck!


ive been reliably informed that big boss's story ended in mgs4. then how's he in mgs5?


elon musk is an anagram of "l am notch"


I have 3 children. A son, a daughter & HS2. And I’m doing my best to stop the country giving birth to a 4th, Brexit.


*boruto voice* my wife


can someone explain how newsposting is supposed to be fun when the text field is literally 2 characters wide


ive got a little gizmo in the bottom-right of every text field that lets me stretch it out so i just use that


also i think it all gets squashed because some asshole keeps posting large pictures in the news and they crush the textboxes for some reason (im the asshole)


i made the main offenders smaller hope that helps ^_^


*borat voice* believe it


*borat voice* my wifi


~? Cutey Zone Recommends ?~
      Money Puzzle Exchanger

The fast paced Sailor Moon influenced coin matching puzzler is now available on Nintendo Switch! Buy it (or play the original arcade version) or be banished from the Cutey Zone forever.

I'll surely get Sakura next time... oh!


helix community alumni MitchellXD is doing a top 303 ranking of a list of crowd-recommended videogame music and they took a big wet shit on a rayman origins track, a zettai hero project track and a mario cars 2 64 track so actually im glad they dont post here any more


(thats not entirely true please come back mitch, but also reassess ur rankings of all of those tracks u bastard)


remember when catkilller7 came back and revealed they were the creator of a semi-popular my little pony murder-fic.

more like ponykilller7.


whats yomamasmama up to these days.


*extremely someone who still says robotnik voice* love 2 play jumper 4: jumper climbs a mountain by yomamasmama


ogmo befriends the physical manifestation of his depression after falling off a mountain


were princess and upside evil? i never got what all that was about. im gonna say theyre not. theyre actually very good. imo they helped ogmos body off the spike and put his inverted version (headcanon is it's his skeleton) back in there and now theyre all roommates and they go on wacky sitcom adventures like trying to get a sofa up a set of stairs or getting a tv delivered to the wrong apartment


ogmo went to ogmo planet and they were very respecting of his decision to go to ogmo planet but never replaced him on the lease in case he wanted to come back home


wait was catkilller7 a reference to the cult hit video game killler7? i cant believe im just realising this now. well played hebs.


^^^ *extremely that "i just realised weird al is a pun on norm al" viral tweet voice*


the three l's in catkilller7 stand for life, love and liberty


i think princess and upside were hired by the boss to keep track of ogmo or something. or maybe that was just a fan theory but i dont feel like replaying j2 to find out right now


spla2n is good. if you see me in a match im *G&KWeedLordGokuStalin68 and youd better booyah back

i only play ranked battles and salmon run so if you see that name in a turf war and there's no splatfests going on, its not me


uh sylvie your twitter got suspended


im glad twitter is finally cracking down on the nazi accounts *holds finger up to ear* wait sorry, im receiving a correction, theyre actually cracking down on pixel cat game accounts


yep i got suspended for a week. the reason they gave was that apparently another account i own was "permanently suspended for abuse", but i only have two active accounts and the other wasnt permanently suspended

i tried to appeal the suspension and explained that i didnt know which account they were talking about, and after a couple days i got back a generic message saying that i had repeatedly violated the twitter rules and further appeals would be ignored

iirc the only other account i have other than my public & private twitters is my old username @cutewitchyhouse which just had a tweet redirecting people to @sylviefluff, which maybe violated the rules against "username squatting"? thats all i can think of (and that account has been deleted now)



i know a few other people whove suddenly been suspended. think their modbots are acting overly zealous (while still missing out the terfs and fascists somehow)


BBC NEWS: Twitter shares open 15% lower as number of monthly users slips


wonder why users are slipping. what possible reason.


excited for the blood moon tonight. not only will all my enemies return to life, but i may receive a cooking bonus and some npcs will behave differently.


my jeans have a label inside that says "original pepe comfort" and i only notice it when im using the toilet because i pull my trousers all the way down to pee (feels good man)


regret to inform you all that the blood moon worked as advertised.


the chuckle brothers (as seen in chucklevision, chucklehounds, the penisarm picture) are back but this time theyre trapped in a funny home videos compilation show

how will they get out of this one????


game design absolutionism blows. ill do it when it's an unpopular hot take im spouting like "videogames should require you put all ur extremities in a vice which tightens as you kill each enemy otherwise it's just bad game design" but like people who just get mad about the concept of Lives systems or random battles or not having an open world fuckin blow and need to go


its bad human design when you think, to have a brain that makes you think all games should meet some arbitrary ruleset.


im sorry but now *looks up flavour of the month* god of war is out, nobody should ever make a game that doesn't have one long camera take the entire game for no reason. there's just no excuse. this sounds like a stupid joke post but im deadly serious. please read more of my writing on reset era dot com as i explain why in a post breath of the wild world, it is a folly to make a game where you can't climb walls.


oh im also angry about professional games reviewers wholl write like "this game is very competently made but also i think i saw some of the mechanics before so it's actually shit"

like the rockpapershotgun reviews of hollow knight and la mulana 2. this game is too much like metroid! you press a button to jump rather than waggling a trackball, and also im going to criticise the things they do handle differently because i can't be bothered making the effort to understand how theyre conscious decisions that lend themselves to the design of the game and its themes.


well we're out of news space yall. we had a good run but thats it. no more news folks. end of the news. nothin left t


i think the news is fixed? lets see if this message gets cut off


yeah that fi


terminator: "im back baby. altavista"
skynet: "but im skynet you can't defeat me"
terminator: "more like sky-not" picks up helicopter
skynot: "unbelieveable, you haven't seen the last of me terminator!" terminator throws helicopter at skynets face "argblbbbl"
sarah connor: "yeah fuck em up terminator"


WHY DOES SPLATOON 2 HAVE AN ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT REFERENCE NOW


splatoon: *makes a spice girls reference*
me: :)
splatoon: *makes a jem reference*
me :)
splatoon: *makes an arrested development reference*
me fucK OF


in case anyones wondering where teh cutey zone loss poster went, apparently it was splatoon 2 judging by the not-miiverse posts everywhere


i was watching tv and some boring magazine show started playing a tune from life is strange before the storm and then stopped after about 10 seconds and i feel like this is an attack on me

first of all, the song wasn't even relevant? the tv piece was about droughts affecting farming and this song (they didn't even get to the lyrical part) is about floods and binge drinking and the death of youth.

second of all, as stated, it stopped 10 seconds in. why roll out an absolute banger for no reason and then stop it immediately? tv blows.


every piece of media ever made exists only to attack me. if its not making me sadder and gayer its reminding me of things that make me sadder and gayer and then immediately changing the subject before i can react.


current mood: car support forums that get mad if you just ask a question and bail

um actually you should introduce yourself and also you should have just pmed this specific person rather than posting a thread asking a question youd know this if you read the fifth rules thread buried about 4 subforums deep.

you need 25 posts before you can pm people by the way, please use our designated spam thread to get to 25 posts. there is a 60 second cooldown between posts to prevent spam.

fuck off


i miss specialised forums being such a big thing but i dont miss people being humongous fuckin ego trip power lord dipshits. why would anyone want to read anyone's introduction posts ever? why mandate people make them before they ask the one thing they came for? why get pissy when people double post? aughghghhg


sorry i just use the news to complain about things but everything sucks so much on like a fractal level. reaction gifs suck. h*ckin pupper doggo shit sucks. nazis suck. twitter sucks. ni no kuni 2 sucks. the one person on resetera who goes full gammon every time they play splatoon and posts weirdly specific stuff about hoping their Idiot Team doesn't have kids because theyd feed them concrete instead of baby formula and how theyre just going to shoot themselves in the head because they went down a rank sucks. the switch's wifi sucks. the shit hot temperature rn sucks.


magpies and ducks dont suck theyre cool.


thinkin about that raven that says "y'alright love?" theres another one that says "nevermore" in a microsoft sam voice. birds are cool.


Hi I'm new here! ^_^ Can't wait to post about Jumper 2 with y'all!!! o_o /// Please be gentle with me??? =uwu=

How do i beat gostbot thanks in advants

*never posts ever again*


i came up with a game idea, its called splatuza and if sega and nintendo want to give me a call id be happy to explain in more detail


youtubes trying to recommend me nick robinson videos again. how do i disable youtube.


also on that note, rockpapershotgun seems to have dropped brock wilbur, who news fans might recognise as a previous subject of my endless ire.

turns out that in addition to his writing being horribly painfully bad, hes also an abuser??? and people knew this at least as far back as february last year??? and Incredibly PC Videogame Website rockpapershotgun hired him anyway???


i mean i cant say im surprised that a guy who, when he isn't being paid to write "infinity wars is the dark souls of cinema" and "i hate farming simulator and everyone who likes it is a moron", spends his time quote tweeting donald trump with some lukewarm burns, would turn out to not only be merely performatively woke, but also actually a humongous piece of shit.


"well this unfunny mediocre white man is a sexual abuser, but where else can we find someone to post enough zero-effort articles on the weekends to push the occasional saturday feature by women and pocs off the front page before anyone can see them"

~ john walker of rock paper shotgun dot com, shortly before writing another centrist dad tweet bomb about how everything the tories do is actually corbyns fault and anyone who disagrees is brainwashed


so excited 2 play yakuza kiwami 2 i forgot it came out this month


rip barry chuckle


befriended a wild duck 2day. a h*ckin doggo scared her off but she came back and hung around with me while i did a puzzle book

dogs suck ducks own


my limited edition exapunk goodies just arrived!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hype 2 be a pretend hacker

never bought a limited edition anything before but zachtronics engineering games never let me down and the zines are cool


mods please change this page address to blog.167.88.165.30/old


exapunks is releasing 2 weeks early!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! even more hype 2 be a pretend hacker


glad everyones favourite blue clad indie game hero has arrived in smash to give everybody a "bad time"


petitioning sakurai to remove k rool from smash

or like, redesign him without the nasty rotting eye or something please


im liking the person in the exapunks subreddit who wants to wait for further in-game clarification before theyll accept that a character in a cyberpunk game who uses they pronouns is nonbinary, but also wants to say its a very bold and risky move from the dev if thats the case!


exapunks is good btw just keeping you all informed. im struggling to hack the virtualboy tho but im halfway there

exapupdate: i hacked the virtual boy AND the wonderswan


(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DkSSjGhU4AADb7h.jpg:large)

rip imgur


i just beat one of the devs of videogame snipperclips and cocreator of seminal internet comedy video "the decline of videogames" in a round of splatoon 2 tower control

that technically means i made snipperclips now. welcome to the forum that made snipperclips.


uh he can keep decline of videogames tho


be gay do crimes


the 2017 ducktales series ended with a shot of the moon while a sad version of the moon music from the nes game played


Kony 2012


nico nico nii 2012


i love nico yazawa


trying to figure out if the experience of rubbing your cursor on and off a youtube video (circa 2007) to make it buffer faster was a universal thing

tried searching for people talking about it, but i guess Big Google doesn't want the truth to get out there

------

i definitely did some wild stuff to see if things would buffer faster i forget if i did this tho


still get theme of "the nutshack" stuck in my head occasionally


classic genre of music "theme of nut"


the gamemakers toolkit guy started begging for a free videogame code on twitter and lol im maybe done with this dude


https://soundcloud.com/knightofgames2/the-ultimate-showdown-of-ultimate-destiny-except-only-godzilla


i dont like to watch "game design analysis" videos because i am above them. i will demonstrate my intellectual superiority over all game design youtubers in my upcoming masterpiece KittyRPG


also that godzilla song is really good


just thinkin,,,, would anyone here post on a cutey zone discord server?

pros would be u could chat with the cutey zoners more casually about whatever i guess without it being on the open internet
cons: wed probably all post even less here tho....


id probably mostly just lurk in a discord, it depends what yall are talking about. id probably be down for casual videogame + cartoon chat or whatever


i would join the discord server.... whether i would post depends on if other people post in it.......

Title: Re: News Purge: 2020-09-25
Post by: SquareWheel on September 25, 2020, 03:13:39 AM

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

i was thinking about changing my avatar to this picture but i dont know. i kind of like my current avatar..... ill just post it in the new instead
(http://love-game.net/img/sheepy.png)


it sucks that nintendos going to start charging for online this month...... i hope it immediately tanks and the splatoon playbase collapses and they abandon it and refund everyone and everyone starts playing again.

or better yet i hope they just cancel it before it even starts. the entire splatoon plaza is people complaining about it anyway right now and saying goodbyes because their parents/they refuse to buy the sub


i keep seeing people on forums saying "if you can afford a 300 dollar console and several hundreds of dollars of games then you can afford 20 dollars a year"

and uhh assuming they werent gifts or hand me downs, if someones already paid 300 dollars + another couple hundred dollars on top of that for games (and another hundred or so to their isp and their electric company), maybe thats a good reason they shouldnt have to pay another 20 a year on top of that for something thats historically been free and is basically pure profit for a company thats already doing incredibly well right now?

thats without getting into things like people already having to have pay for multiple subscriptions for different console ecosystems, people's living circumstances changing, households with more than one player needing more expensive/multiple subscriptions, and a billion other reasons why it's a non-trivial cost to a lot of people.


not to mention how shady and secretive nintendos being about all this. no news posts or anything on the switch itself about it recently (there was one (singular) maybe 2 months ago and thats it), but they are running a sale on all their online multiplayer games right now to sucker people in before they hold those games back for ransom in a few weeks.


anyway fuck microsoft for normalising online subs and fuck sony and fuck nintendo for going along with it

(https://i.imgur.com/zGxBnDi.gif)
^ actual footage of bill gates making online cost money while playing fusion frenzy 2


(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Dmm8T3hU8AEZlOW.png:large)


not letting me use the right analogue stick to navigate your ui is a failure of game design sorry but its true


well fuck


highway man promises to start mugging me on my daily route to town in a few months. im reassured that he'll be mugging me for less than his contemporaries.

highway man tells me he needs another few months to prepare. i am distraught.

highway man is finally ready and i am overjoyed.


i argue with people who disagree with the methods of the highway man. he'll make the road better so it's worth paying the fee. he hasn't said that's what he'll do but i can't imagine he wouldn't. you fools, you morons, it's a shilling a week. you can afford it (probably) therefore you should pay it. in fact, im angry that you'd rather just stop using the road.


update: very confused that i can no longer rendezvous with my comrades in my usual haunts. they all seem to have left the town completely.

naturally, i blame them all for this. if they just paid the highway man's very reasonable fee, everything would be fine and-*ground collapses beneath me due to disrepair and i die*


wow ur saying i can use my PHONE to TALK to people while i PLAY videogames ONLINE????? and i can even put it on what might be called a SPEAKERPHONE MODE, if such a concept were to already exist????? and all for only $20 a year????? thanks mister nintendal


sorry but im still incredibly mad about this whole thing what the fuck. like i know its been expected but like,,, how do you announce a paywall 5 days before it goes live and act like youre doing everyone a favor. i dont want shitty nes games, the one game id like cloud saves for (or better yet, the ability to just copy the save onto an sd card) wont because what if someone save scums their rank (which wouldn't affect anything but themselves when they get stuck in the high level matches without the skills to deal)

i hope (and kind of expect) the launch will be apocalyptic given how many people ive seen who dont follow the enthusiast press who are confused and annoyed that multiplayers suddenly gonna be locked behind a paywall.
gonna be fireworks when people wake up to their kids crying that they can't play minecraft any more. but games they didn't pay money for like fortnite still work.


videogames suck i actually hate any and all videogames now sorry if youve ever made a videogame but youre my enemy


want to point out that yakuza is not a videogame, it's an interactive soap opera tia


hey i havent checked the news in a while. hows it going in here. i dont play any onlines in the nintendo but it sounds like a bad situation....


lol heres my last word on the nintendo thing but it super blows for me especially because i hate subscription things period. theyre bad for me. if it was like "pay $60 to play online forever" id still be pissed but id pay it, but a recurring payment does this psychological thing to me where if i dont use it for a month i feel like im wasting money and i get really fuckin anxious because of it. i dont have a cellphone contract i just buy credit when i need it. i dont touch netflix or anything else like that. photoshop and office moving to subscriptions only meant im just sticking with the old versions forever. like i could just buy 3 years of sub right now or whatever and be done with it but then ill get mad for betraying my conscience and then ill get caught up thinkin about the people who are like "stop whining youre just gonna buy it anyway" and i dont exactly have the money to throw at it anyway. it just fuckin blows and i cant even enjoy the last 5 hours ill ever get of splatoon 2 online because im too pissed off to play properly. and all the people bootlicking and getting mad at people for boycotting makes me even more pissed off. i hate everything. god. fuck. i hope nintendo goes bankrupt and all their stans fuckin die especially the one who keeps posting the ableist shibe image macro at anyone who has even minor issues with nintendo online.

not a good time to be a fan of non-exploitative videogame business practices or left wing politics or not being depressed for unrelated reasons right now, ill tell you.


on the other hand, get hype for the splatoon 1 scene to pick up again (altho i hear it never went quiet, but its gonna get a boost from this). there's a few stages i never got to play before i moved on.


wanna be a less negative person but also theres too many people not only letting bad things happen but also legitimately those bad things are actually good and mock people who think otherwise because capitalism and centrism give people fucknasty brain spiders and i want to scream


the cutey zone and the one something awful thread that i post in are the only good places on the entire internet. burn the rest of it down.


oh i am very excited for parents investigating why mario kart isn't working tomorrow to be confronted with A Lot Of Articles about donald trumps penis and for then to blame nintendo for it


wish i wasnt having a bad bout of the sadbrains rite now


holy shit i can still play splatoon 2 online because i havent updated the firmware to 6.0.0

good going nintendo you absolute brain geniuses. matchmaking's slow as hell though now theyve killed the community.


ok smarter people than me probably already had this figured out and are already working on it, but i think it might be possible to bypass the online paywall.

ive been playing splatoon 2 all day without even so much as signing up to the free trial, but the switch was on standby with the game running overnight when the paid online kicked in. so i think when you boot up a game with online features, the switch phones home, checks everything's in order with the accounts server, and then allows the game to connect to its own matchmaking server at will.
the matchmaking server assumes if you've been allowed to connect everything must be in order. if im correct, the only way ill lose splatoon 2 online functionality is if i close the game, or when the game servers detect a version mismatch next time they update it.

so what if someone were to intercept that initial call home. like, the switch is connected through a proxy, and when thinks it's calling home, it's actually calling a program that mimics nintendos handshake and sends it on its way.


i cant get into hollows knight..... its very well made and stuff but it doesnt excite me the way la-mulana 2 did

i bought it in august and played it for a few hours and then i didnt really feel any urge to go back to it after that..... i just picked it up again while im waiting for my laundry to do but i feel like im just wandering aimlessly through mushroom land and nothing is interesting or inspires any emotion in me

maybe i will just watch the raocow lp.... how did other news posters feel when playing it? was the world immediately compelling to you or did it take a while to get into it?


i enjoyed hollow knight quite a bit at the time once i got past the slow beginning and the game started opening up. i kind of liked the lack of direction but i think it becomes an issue in the postgame. not really played it much since i beat the last boss (with 69% completion nice) because it stops feeling like im discovering things organically and more like im doing cleanup duty.

booted it up again when the last update came out but couldn't find anything new in the 20 minutes i spent wandering around so i stopped.

like, i enjoyed it in the moment but it hasnt really stuck with me. i guess ill look up where the new stuff is and get back to it at some point.


the bowsette/powser discourse is cursed

update: ive decided it's blessed actually

update 2: it's blessed and cursed in equal measure.


428 shibuya scramble is a good notgame

if youre in the market for something thats not a videogame and is therefore unharaam, pick it up. it's good.


its also cool to play a convoluted visual novel that is convoluted for reasons that are still fairly grounded, and not because of time loops and morphogenesis and genetic memory and all that.

(which isnt to say that games that are convoluted for those reasons are bad, the opposite in fact, but it's nice to play a flowchart visnov that doesn't go deep into entertaining scifi bullshit and is still an interesting story to unravel. yes im aware 428 predates and is a direct inspiration for those games)

shibuya scramble is so good and it keeps surprising me in new ways. buy this game piece of interactive fiction! buy it buy it buy it!!!!


im doing research into the guy who plays yanagishita and it turns out shibuya scramble is actually a biopic

Quote

a convoluted visual novel that is convoluted for reasons that are still fairly grounded

regret to inform you all that i got the ending where i got sucked into a hell dimension by a malfunctioning robot suit

buy 428 shibuya scramble


if telltale took more prompts from game of 2008, 428 shibuya scramble, and less from heavy rain, maybe theyd still be around

(that said, i think having multiple shitty ceos with no business savvy is what killed off telltale)


me:  capitalism sucks
also me:  but i bet id be better at it than all these fuckos


here's my 3 point plan to save telltale games, assuming i somehow wind up as the ceo and it's still 2010.

1 - do more adventure game style stuff in the choice based games. not necessarily puzzles, but give players the freedom to explore the world at their own pace. investigate the environment. hear what their characters have to think about every object in the world or every dialogue tree. dont just force players from one cutscene to another with a 5 second input window for choices.

2 - stop buying expensive licenses. smaller licenses are mutually beneficial. batman doesn't need more attention but fables maybe does and people are already fans are pretty likely to appreciate a quality game based on it (except the fables creator is a fascist so maybe pick another another niche franchise though).

3 - stop discounting games by like 50% before theyre finished. people who buy episode 1 and then there's a discount before ep 2 even happens will be pissed. everyone else will wait til the season wraps up by which point they've watched most of it on youtube already.
3a - just stop doing episodic stuff. release the full game all at once. nobody discusses telltale games inbetween episodes so it's not like you even get the benefit of fans getting hyped about cliffhangers and hyping everyone else up.

thanks for reading the cutey zone news, former ceos dan connors and kevin whosit. hope this advice helps you to unfire 250 people.


happy hallow's ween...... love-game.net/halloween/ (http://love-game.net/halloween/)


(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Dqzjz74XgAEsiaR.jpg:large)


i thought of a way to fix twitter.

so whats the problem with twitter? is it the like button? is it the fact that tweets aren't 560 characters? is it the fact youre still able to block nazis and the valuable discourse they provide?

no jack, its the fact that going viral just means your menchies are full of shitheads who get mad if you plug something you can actually make money out of.

so here's my proposal. if you're replying to someone who you aren't mutuals with, you gotta pay them. when someone says "don't do this weird thing guys" and you think oh ho, what if i did that exact thing i was told not to... but ironically, you can! but you gotta pay them money.

you want to quote tweet someone with your Epic takedown or make some weird creepy horny response to their nail polish selfie or let them know youre stealing their meme (here's my meme stealing prevention rune, now here's my meme protection rune remover, now here's my meme protection rune remover stopper, etc etc) then 10 cents of your credit (you buy top-ups of $10 or more at a time) is removed from your account and transferred to them for them to cash out at any time.

win win for everyone.


(but obviously with an option to allow free responses to tweets/accounts that you do actually want randos to engage with)


(https://i.imgur.com/9REq4x0.png)


doctor who just had an overt reference to the hit sierra online videogame, space quest, but also posited that corporations are friendly and have our best interests at heart and only kill innocent people when trying to weed out pro union activists and arbeit macht frei so on reflection its impossible to say if doctor who is good or not


(https://i.imgur.com/SZ2uOK7.png)

'Adult'


the words "furry" and "erotica" obviously dont need the bbc house-style quote marks.
no the article doesn't explain furries.
yes, however, the bbc absolutely provides a 101 idiots guide to brexit on every article about it.

i guess furry erotica doesn't need an introduction


i am questioning why "'Adult'" needed clarifying at all though, considering the word "erotica" does all the contextual heavy lifting already.


i have many issues with the editorial decisions of the bbc.


furry pr0n xD


my nintendo broke and its several days out of warranty. sorry folks the switch sucks actually.


"Before you send your device in, make sure to back up all files you wish to keep, as they may be lost in the repair process"

funny joke. ha ha. go fucking bankrupt nintendo you assholes and take the rest of the industry with you. couldnt even back up my splatoon file even if i did pay for your bullshit online bullshit.


and q's deactivated his george drome account. gonna be honest yall, today sucks.


all this talk these days about 'adult' furry erotica has got me contemplating selling commissions. furries apparently pay well and dont pull any of that "do it for exposure" bs

pros: money
cons: ive legitimately never even looked at a porn so i wouldnt know how to draw it. maybe id have to focus on paraphilias like vore or something. plus i guess the more specific and niche you get the more people pay for that content. huh i guess vore is probably pretty mainstream and therefore unprofitable seeing as i know about it. what could be more niche than vore. uh maybe i dont want to do this.


i saw someone mention tar once (wrt to tar being a mechanic in a particular videogame) and how it had some unfortunate implications if u know what i (they) mean winky face

and uhhhhh, tar is literally just a thing that exists why would it have unfortunate implications?????? did people make tar horney????????? (i looked into this at the time and yes, the concept of tar as it exists in our actual world is apparently an entire subgenre of yiff????????????)


aw it sucks that your switchy broke sorry news poster i hope u have a good day on the day that you read this......


thanks! im not really as upset or mad as my newsposts sound (or i want to feel) im kinda just numb. it stopped turning on and instead of dread or horror i was just like "huh yeah. sure." fingers crossed it all works out tho


i wish tech was a little more open. i understand why obviously i cant just tweak the switch os to back up save files manully (fuck off nintendo) but its still frustrating when a piece of equipment you have has some quirk and you cant do anything about it

ive got a flip phone i use and its great and i love it but god i wish i could go in and modify the os. make the text cursor move faster and also wrap when you hit the end of a message. have custom open/close jingles (i was excited to use the midna noises from twilight princess but it turns out my options are just beep or no beep) or to make my own snake variant to throw on there for funsies


wanna make a bespoke flip phone tbh but i wouldnt know how

i miss the days of every phone being unique and quirky and now theyre all just iphones except this one has a screen that wraps all the way around and this one has 5 notches for all 5 cameras.


FARTSMITH IS NOT QUAKSTER


im glad the cutey zone is keeping communism alive comrades

Title: Re: News Purge: 2020-09-25
Post by: SquareWheel on September 25, 2020, 03:13:51 AM

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

does anyone remember that mountain joke that people spammed on the matt makes games forum until they were banned
i forgot the context for why it was funny but the scenario is stuck in my mind for some reason


second aus rip!!!!!!

oh hundred mountains posting? it owned


dreamt quakster came back to the cutey zone and was posting as "q rebrand #69" and he left a comment on my profile that just said "ivymander"


(https://i.imgur.com/CJORLJI.png)

nice


i think FARTSMITH might actually be quakster. if you remember on the old forums quakster used to post "fart" sometimes. so i think the name is meant to be a subtle clue that its quakster. anyways post your thoughts and theories in the news and have fun.


as a sensible centrist, i have examined all the arguments put forward and i have formally decided that the truth is perfectly in the middle. FARTSMITH is exactly one half quakster and one half something else

i think the extremists on both sides of this argument have some growing up to do before they are as wise as me


lost all my switch save files :)

love 2 not be allowed to back up my saves without hacks that would have voided my warranty. v cool + good.


rip the 140 hours of xenoblade 2 or whatever. splatoon im less upset about altho i had a similar amount of time in that too, but i cant play that shit ever again and i wouldnt have been able to back up that data even if id paid the cloud saves ransom.


actual live footage of me right now vvv

*remembers that giant tity rabbit with biological high heels in xenoblade 2* actually i didnt want to play xenoblade 2 any more anyway


trotim rolled out a classic helix games forum meme on twitter. trotim go on cutey zone.


1/1/2019 update: thanks trotim


getting my switch back on monday because the lousy courier doesn't do weekend deliveries, pals!!! fortunately nintendo already sent my joycons and dock back separately for some reason?????

im incredibly glad i dont give a shit about smash this time around because i would be dying from not playing it right now. instead im playing monster hunter 3 again for some reason despite having 3 more recent entries.


it is a good thing that i hadnt actually touched the switch since the online bullshit paywall came in 3 months ago, so the withdrawal symptoms werent so bad.


thinkin about smash bro melee reminded me i need to get in touch with my old friends from around that time.......... losing contact with people sucks

even moreso when i can actually still get in touch at any time but im too shy + anxious now


spider man spider verse was v good, and yall should watch it because it blows the live action marvel films out of the water


oh oh oh one thing i will say before i never say anything nice about nintendo ever again is that the call center hold music is the breath of the wild trailer theme

i used to work in an office adjacent to someone who had to deal with call centers a lot and i am so glad to finally hear call center music that isnt the first part of vivaldi's four seasons on loop forever


congrats to matt makes games on winning the schick hydrobot award 2018 for celick the clown deluxe ultimate edition directors cut

love the fourm that made lol vs biss


cutey zone: the forum that made celeste


"wow this really did numbers, heres my paypal" no fuck off, nobody deserves money for viral content *wendys calls someone a dunderhead* haha this is epic i should buy a burger


decided my new internet persona gimmicks are "person who gets incredible rude with people who plug their creative work underneath a viral tweet" and "person who scrolls through buzzfeed viral tweet roundups and clicks all the You Should Also Read This links"


a Which Dead Kennedy Are You personality test? i dont even know who they are but im compelled to click it anyway. ooh but first... funniest "i dont have a soundcloud but..." parody tweets? hell yeah. drag those assholes


me: [sees a heckin sm0l pupper] hmm... what an superlatively diminutive canine


The algorithm has been improved, and will now automatically detect and tag people you subtweet.


my actual new posting gimmick is not shutting the fuck up about twitter until i gets closed down. then ill move onto complaining about resetera all the time instead.


its so painful to see otherwise very smart and cool people yelling that the solution to the complex and non-partisan political issue of brexit is for the left wing opposition to just call it all off somehow


also fun is "corbyn wants a general election rather than a second referendum"

which.... yeah? a second referendum AT BEST lets the tories off the hook and allows them to continue the monumental skull fucking they have and will continue to do to the poor and marginalised whilst successfully blaming it in Barmy Brussels Bureaucrats and Remoaners, and most realistically, a second referendum is gonna just end in the same result and give them cover to do the Full Mass Paup Death Disaster Capitalist Brexit theyre thirsting to do.


love the brain geniuses who see a man who says "i think we should make things better for people, and i think we should do a brexit if it would legitimately help this cause but not if it wouldnt" and spend all their time attacking him for not just cancelling it here and now (without the power to do so ???) and very little time complaining about the sociopath who openly and publicly laughs at the idea of homeless people dying on the street and is trying to force through something in a form that will murder millions just because it helps her drive down net migration.


"if corbyn would just say brexits bad, he'd be way ahead in the polls" yeah i dont think telling 50%+ of the voting population, including a good chunk of your own supporters, that they were wrong to vote for brexit is a real vote winner, even if youre right.

of course brexits shit. of course a lot of dirty money went into the campaign. but a lot of people are convinced they werent fooled by the lies and that No Deal Turbo Death Mad May Fury Road Brexit is exactly what they wanted all along. you cant reason people out of that short of fixing all the things they blamed on the eu but were actually the fault of austerity and then going "oh i guess everythings fine now. we dont need to brexit after all."


also enacting proper actual press regulation as recommended by an inquiry into the british press's repeated misconduct (look up the events leading to the leveson inquiry) to stop all the "iron lady may is very strong and stable and you definitely want her to step on you in a horny way, brexits good and any warnings that we'll lose access to food and medicine are just Project Fear, corBIN is a racist who also slept with a black woman and that proves hes bad" propaganda


politic's sucks yall. its bad.

ill be glad when brexits cancelled and/or everyones dead from self inflicted brexit so nobody has to say the hell word "brexit" ever again.


New "very hard" Celeste levels to be released in New Year


also the next mattgames getting announced soon too apparently?? heres hoping its a jumper->celeste sitch and we get an untitled story but with a banging soundtrack


get hype for Ultra Stickman Escape :watermelon:


if any of u havent been watching the battle of gatwick ur missing out

latest word from the scene is that the flock of malicious drones that mercilessly attacked a fleet of brave airliners didnt actually exist in any form


Quick quesh for any wandering newsreaders.

Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?


playing falcoms brandish 4 chrimbo


thats cool i liked that game.....


heres my top games of 2018 list

yakuza 6
yakuza 0 (its objectively a better game than 6 but i like 6 a little bit more. its close tho)
yakuza 5 (im only 18 hours in but i like it a lot so far. i just did the boss fight with the giant bear and its a monster hunter game now.)
yakuza kiwami 2
yakuza kiwami
yakuza 4

thanks for reading my games of the year 2018, the year i played almost all the yakuza games and absolutely nothing else


my actual gotys of games that came out in 2018 are, in no particular order because they all fill different niches:

yakuza 6
celeste
428 shibuya scramble
monster hunter world
obra dinn


if nobody else posts their 2018 goatses (games of a thi syear e) in the next 7 hours then my list becomes cutey zone goaste canon and nobody can change it

e: the list is sealed


i liked la mulana 2


yeah la mulana 2 was good. ill add it to the 2018 gotys list next time.


uhhhh i won $18 worth of bitcoin by accident and i dont know how i do anything with this

id post the address here for someone smarter than me to have but a) itd get stolen by bots probably and b) i lost the address


incredibly excited to see where everyone jumps ship to once discord goes too far with the subscription begs


hey use our chat software! its way better than the old thing that's since become bloated adware! just chat, no frills.

* some time later *

our chat software is now an all in one gaming app steam competitor, remember to buy a $100 a year subscription to get all the features you loved about msn messenger! we'll put a button to gift it somewhere prominent so you won't forget. it'll be next to the gif reaction button... oopsie woopsie we're having a bit of downy wowny time right now! o rly? *dabs* we'll be back quicker than you can say "imma stop you there" xD


i wish there was a way to make it so youtube only recommends things that directly relate to watch im watching. so if its music from mario kart, only recommend me mario kart. if its an lp, only recommend me videos by the same lper.

rather than, you know, watching a mickey mouse cartoon and having the Up Next Autoplay (which ive got turned off, dont worry) and half the recommendeds be "FEMINAZI gets FUCKEN OWNED by FACTS AND LOGIC" or "Crazy ASMR Slime Surprise Egg Challenge!!! - Try Not To Laugh or Cringe or Feel Satisfied!!!!" or some weird fart fetish video starring elsa from frozen and spiderman.


v hype for this generation of kids to grow up with incredibly screwed up ideas and beliefs thanks to The Algorithm.

its fucked up seeing old people get right wing radicalised by facebook, gonna be even worse when its people who have had nazi shit piped into their brains from birth.


heard good things about this kimono friends cartoon. dont have time to catch up so i guess ill just watch season 2 and hit the ground running ^_^


i saw some kind of new kemono friends spinoff on crunchy roll but i didnt watch it..... its sad because the original is objectively the greatest anime series of all time but i lost all interest in any followups after the cataclysm


heres a gamecommdation for yall. its called crosscode and its a cute rpg with a lot of Very Good Ideas and i dont really want to say much more

(not becaust one of those games where surprise, its actually incredibly meta and you, the player, have been bamboozled by this twist! because it's not that at all, its just got a lot of very cute gameplay and story ideas and concepts throughout that i wouldnt want to spoil for anyone who hasnt played it yet)


after making that recommendation, crosscode made me cry, so im going to recommend it even harder because i only cry at the best games.

(i dunno if anyone else has or even would cry at the part that got me, because it was more about me overlaying my own experiences on this very specific sci fi scenario, but god it was cathartic)


pinpicle rick


was gonna make a post complaining into the void about the new gif and gift buttons on discord but i chcked the reddit first and squarewheel beat me to it there


me: copyright sucks and should be obliterated
also me: i fuckin hope some big tv company content strikes giphy and drags it down to hell


oh i already complained about discord like a week ago. point still stands. :colbert:


If everytime we added a new feature we also added a toggle (which people tell us to do every time there's a change) there would just be a menu somewhere with dozens of pages of toggles and Discord would be the worst thing in the world to use.

The reality is that we don't throw things at a dart board and do what random chances tell us. Both the gif button and the nito gift option were highly upvoted features on our feedback website and people have been asking for them for years. A lot of thought went into these features and we know that, ultimately, they're going to provide a benefit for a large number of users. That being said, we're always listening to feedback about our new features and if you want your voice heard you should head over to https://feedback.discordapp.com

Lastly I just want to assure anyone reading this that 80% of our entire team is focused on making sure that the application, the chatting, the memes, the video calls/screen sharing, et al. is working well and continuing development on it. The nitro gifting box, the gif button, the mobile indicator were all added because a large number of people wanted them and (relatively speaking) they were easy to add. This does NOT mean that we've shifted our focus away from what we do best (our core app) in any way.


the memes


wow the discord preview build is looking good

sylvey is in the news.....


rather than having bookmarks, most of the websites and pages i regularly go to i navigate to by typing part of the address and picking it from the autocomplete


i am mentioning this because the muscle memory to go to the badwebcomics blog from over 10 years ago suddenly kicked in recently and i keep almost trying to go there every time im on websurf autopilot


thankfully autocomplete only gives me the options for multiple videogame battle themes or a twitter account with the profile name "mr gorbachev, hit those back walls"


(https://i.imgur.com/LXwiPci.png)

funny brexit meme i made


February's News Discussion is:

hey does anyone remember the browser game Mafia City by dabomstew? did anyone here besides me play it? thanks in advancve


i think i remembmer it.....


saw a republic of gamers graphics card and a gaming keyboard that said "rise up"

im glad someone out there is looking out for us gamers, the most oppressed minority. we live in a society.


oh my fucking god i unfollowed an otherwise ok lper a few years ago because every video she was in turned into how much she hated this one games writer who's not even that prolific, and i just opened a thread on resetera and she was in there and shes still posting about how much she hates him???? just totally unprompted???????

like the dude isnt notably bad in any way. hes not a known creep, he's not a known trump supporter. he just wrote for a game that some people like and she doesnt and when i unsubbed it was because she kept bending any conversation towards how Terrible this guy is and shes apparently still doing it years later. in a thread about a video it turns out she made about how its not ok to attack someone else associated with the game she doesnt like?????????


update: the guy announced a new game so the lper is on her bullshit again + is also complaining that people are complaining about her constant complaining


i kinda wanna do a wind waker randomiser stream........... but ive never streamed in my life


i never cheat i never bribe i never scheme i never lie and that wasnt a lie that i said just now id never lie cause i never lie


dont wanna post about this on the main foruns but i got that transgender surgery like a month ago.... its nice


sorry im not more active in the new, im too lazy to get out my computer and newsposting on mobile sucks ass


congrats!!!!


i'm sorry but who added the auto playing music to this, it's annoying please delete it


i didnt add it but i removed it..... sorry to anyone who really liked having a song automatically play in the news


i didnt know we still had the autoplaying music itn, i hadnt heard it for a while so i thought the links had broken or something


im baba


"the baba is you" is a homestuck album by toby fox


baba is Guest

i liked the undertale style twist at the end of baba is you where you find out baba actually wasnt you the entire time


formally proposing that speedruns of the game refer to it as "baba's you"


baba custom soundtrack including hits such as
amma mia
awterloo
nkowing me knowing (baba is) you


(https://i.imgur.com/PdnYpjL.jpg)


if u like baba is you i also recommend stephen's sausage roll

its obviously a very different game but i feel like ssr definitely primed me for the mindset i needed to solve baba puzzles (and id imagine this would be true the other way around) and it's probably the only other game that id say has scratched the same itch for me.

ive played a few other acclaimed sokobanlikes (a good snowman is hard to build, sokobond, etc) but they dont do it for me like baba and sausage roll


oh jelly no puzzles good too tho


once every sunny day, a bee bomps on my bedroom window for a few minutes and this has been a regular occurence for years

ive gotta assume its not the same bee but its nice that the bee family is keeping the tradition going


the bee is just chilling on the window frame today. have a day off bee, youve earned it.


oh dang kemono friends s2 is good?????? i newsposted about watching it as a goof well aware of the behind the scene politics but its wild that the show turned out good anyway


the eu just banned memes. please delete all meme's from your hard drive. thank you in advants.


oh is it really good? im not sure i wanna watch it even if it is.....


meanwhile TATSUKI, the one true kemono friends director, released an anime called kemurikusa this season that i think just finished airing. i havent watched any of it yet since i need to sign up for a fuckening amazon prime account but its probably extremely good. check out the anime kemurikusa today (if its bad let me know and ill remove this news post)


i havent watched any kemono friends ever so i cant speak from experience but i know someone who liked s1 a lot and is v angry about how much they actually really like s2

afaict theres some low points but also some very high points


me: *beats the first boss in one dark souls game* sorry folks im the dark souls girl now. i will only talk about dark souls from now on. afraid yall are just gonna have to Git Good as we in the souls community say if you want to keep up with me.


i will never beat another boss.


i nearly beat a boss in blood orb once though. and i cheesed several bosses in demo'ns soul's.

Title: Re: News Purge: 2020-09-25
Post by: SquareWheel on September 25, 2020, 03:14:00 AM

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

i beat the "asylum demon" in a dark soul once. i havent played it since but its progably a cool game


i would play a lot more dark soules but i get so exhausted playing any of them. i like them a lot but i can only play for 20 minutes at a time which isnt very conducive to making progress. a lot of the things i like about them are also what tires me out so quickly.

maybe ill get sekiro and beat a boss of that one day


pro tip: if you ever feel like playing a prequel to something and you know the prequels gonna have a sad ending, dont go in hoping it somehow has a happy ending anyway


ive done this twice now and both times ive gone in going "ah but maybe some time travel bullshit will happen and everything will be fine" despite the original story being very clear that this doesn't happen and also time travel not even existing in one of these stories


i mean theyve both been very good games that im glad i played and they both really enhanced the original stories like good prequels should but god i want to cry so hard now


oh maybe three times if you count yakuza 0, but i wouldnt say the ending of that ones too sad but it retroactively makes yakuza 1 sadder.


actually its definitely three times because one of the prequels that made me sad had a prequel itself that fucked me up for months afterwards


oh no the every game needs to have an easy/assist mode discourse is back and im seeing it everywhere and im still barely seeing anything on either side i can agree with

anyway im importing That Discourse into the news but only because i know folks here are reasonable about this stuff whichever stance they have


i saw someone say that all games should absolutely be accessible (re fully customisable controls, a lot of subtitles settings, colour blindness options/awareness) but that accessibility is different from difficulty, which is something i totally agree with tho

imo the problem with offering difficulty options is you have to tune those options so theyre still fun and you cant generally trust or expect a player to find that balance themselves, and obviously its a lot more work and it can easily backfire, especially wrt puzzle games where you basically have to design entirely new levels that might still be too hard for some while too easy for completionists (someone i used to follow took genuine offense at snakebird primer having a tooltip that suggested playing the original snakebird for more of a challenge, which was a very ??? reaction to me. same person also took issue with celeste's "patronising" assist mode and how it tracks deaths because they don't want to know how many times theyve died so fuck everyone who does and ughfhgf???)


oh i guess this is assist mode adjacent but i do think a slow mo mode for every game would be cool + good tho. maybe even a tool assist mode just built into console hardware by default.

e: i just saw a good article written by someone with several different disabilities that affect how they play game, discussing how The Discourse is actively stifling accessibility efforts by framing it as a matter of "just having an easy mode" vs actual accessibility options and supporting different input methods, and i think its the best and most nuanced take ive seen on this.
the article focused on modular volume control and camera control options as making a big difference, and how accessibility should be about actually addressing the hurdles people face, rather than a blanket adjustment of health and damage sliders.


fuck fuck the friendly bee didnt show up today but a wasp bomped menacingly against my window for a few seconds shit


announcing my impending rebrand from "the dark souls girl" to "the xenoblade chronicles 2 girl"


xenoblade chronicles was kinda cool, never played the second's one.......


its got some weird horney stuff (i would pay the devs a lot of money to remove the optional character dahlia from the game entirely) but the storys good and the gameplays good and the characters are good and the music is incredibly good and ive sunk about 150 hours into it now between the mid-game playthru when my switch died and my second run so i think i might be invested


Cutey.com Rules (Last Updated April 2019)

No fnuquaks, khakain rebellions or prinnies.
No flaming.
No hateful fads like doge or loss.
No double posting or necroposting (reviving old topics). If absolutely necessary, ask an Admin first.
Break any of these rules and you will receive an orange tick. 5 orange ticks will result in a 1 week ban. 5 1 week bans will result in a permaban. Orange ticks can be offset with green ticks which are received for taking part in our regular sig & avvy competitions and community art projects.


remember the classic lt is a girl inside meme???

remember when the idea of a girl on the red square that bounces forum was a Hilarious Goof before it turned out most of us were girls all along


i remamber.... weird times on the jumper community forum's


drove past this shop earlier (sorey for the google watermark i didnt get my own photo) and im increasingly certain all these logos are the work of a single disgruntled graphic designer

(https://i.imgur.com/P9ovOTN.png)


(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/D5CSkvjUYAEiJw2.png:large)

finally! the queer marvel content!!! i love marvel now


"It was important that one of us [straight cis dudes] play him, to ensure the integrity"


hey syl, i really like your new game byrd. the way dying affects the world is really cool


ba
ba


oh thanks!! its named after the bird from matt thorsons "an untitled story"


thinkin about names instead of going 2 slep............................................


im happy with the alivename i finally settled on (which is like a deadname but the exact opposite) but also i wish society was equipped to deal with me changing my name on a whim to whatever i think sounds good or funny every 5 minutes anyway


updating all my records to list my legal name as "defective pikachu" but then asking them to revert everything back to max lifeisstrange a week later


its fun how many names i cycled thru early on because id pick one and be like "this is the one" and then id meet someone with the name i chose and then id be like "well shit theyre gonna think i was copying their name specifically"


one of the names i landed on got announced as the alivename of a garbage shit head celebrity like a week or two after i started semi-openly trialling it (different spelling but close enough) which is why it got shifted to middle name status, but im still sticking with it online because i still kind of want to use it

i dont get the joke in that siivagunner rip, it just sounds normal

everyones had a lot of fun with the sonic movie design and theres been a lot of fun edits and goofs on it and also multiple ahegao ones for some reason, but im here to say that actually the sonic movie designs ok actually. i dont hate it. its fine. also the vfx team probably shouldnt be forced to crunch to redo the entire thing in the next 6 months imo!!!


they should have just gone with the bald+goggles robotnik for the entire movie tho. and sonic shouldnt be friends with a cop.


i think the sonic looks pretty bad and thats exactly why its a crime that theyre going to revise it


i just realised, the suits are gonna take all teh wrong ideas from the sonic backlash and make the design even worse and its gonna own


same design except sonic has pink arms and a giant realistic lookin monoeye now, and they swap out jim carrey for the aosth robotnik


(https://t00.deviantart.net/hcsLPEfAyt6C5FV6orrclJldXkg=/300x200/filters:fixed_height(100,100):origin()/pre00/2143/th/pre/f/2012/018/e/a/dr_pony_robotnik_by_blackrhinoranger-d4mtama.png)


Eurobeat Brony


(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/D6GOlS3XsAAVzlE.jpg:large)


bee update: havent seen the bee lately. have seen multiple weird flies fucking on my window though.

same day update: ok bees here.


Discord - The Chat For Gamers.


the teacher from the cartoon, arthur, is canon gay and married to a guy. that owns.


wa ha ha wallah lim pah


just found out raytheon isnt a pokemon.


hey yall its the games recommending newsposter, here to say buy druidstone. its incredibly good.

its by the grimrock devs but it's a completely different beast. a turn based tactics game. i could post an essay about how good it is but ill just leave it at: please check it out and maybe buy it if it looks like your scene. it owns.


(http://love-game.net/img/aimaina.gif)


wtf newsposter is talking about grimrock and i literally finished grimrock 2 yesterday, what sorcery is this

ill check out the thing thanks!


this spot for rent

hi i'd like to put in an offer for this spot


hi im ogoms i lik edancing


was the news deleted or something because it doesnt show up anymore


shows up for me but im using the vanilla smf theme


on the default theme there is a (maybe hard to see depending on your theme color) button to the right of the search bar that shows/hides the news


but the barkley 2 never happen


heres my new media review scale: total dogshit -> sad -> gay -> sad & gay -> happy & gay -> sad & happy & gay


play butterfly soup


(https://i.imgur.com/t505pws.png)(https://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/doom/images/d/d7/Doomguy_happy_face.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20170308012642)


magikazam


posting in an epic admin only section


just saw someone on-line use the word "weary" in the way the english language intended and not as a typo of "wary"

i actually had to read it multiple times to parse it properly


anybody else watching this E 3 show? wow this is wild. one minute theres a guy on a stage yelling, the next theres some cartoon guy stabbing and shooting people. how do they come up with this stuff?


*to the melody of Persona 5 - Last Surprise*

you never see ir gomirg


how is there not a mainstream religion that believes there is a god who designed the universe but also that said god is an evil sadist and it is our duty to kill them


im just saying, i think jrpgs have the right idea and we need to hunt down and annihilate god


this thought sponsored by someone telling me "these things are sent to test us" in response to some bad news. fuck that. if some divine fucker is doing this shit to test me i will fucking destroy them


there is literally dragon quest music playing in the distance outside my house right now. no word of a lie. i think i did it guys, i think i isekaid into the videogame world.


one step towards my long term goal of  k i l l i n g   g o d


job interviewer "and what are your ambitions. where do you see yourself 5, 10 years from now"
me "well in the short term i want to spearhead a violent uprising against the cruel deity/ies who shackle us to this nightmare realm of misery. ultimately freeing humanity from its celestial tormentor/s and carving a path to a world free of inequality and tragedy"
interviewer "thats exactly the answer we were looking for, you start the job on tuesday"


not going to lie though, im getting sick of this music. this isnt a comedy bit. there is literally some dragon quest overworld bullshit playing somewhere outside my window. its been looping for an hour now.


an actual brass band and everything. they finally started playing a different track. town theme this time. no wait nevermind, back to the overworld.


the band were back today, this time playing the titanic theme.


im a gamer


hi gamer


todays recommendation is heart of the woods, a vn about a gay ghost and sometimes people who arent the gay ghost. its v warm and pleasant and only sometimes spooky


folk's, im gay


bee update: i found out bees only live for like 6 days or something. i guess bomping on the same section of my window exactly once daily is a family tradition they keep passing down the generations.


enjoying the steam summer sale grand prix gimmick a fair amount! the premise and rules are well thought out and communicated and it is a lot of fun to engage with. props valve!


i am pretty sure the yakuza spinoff game Judge Eyes (known as judgment in less enlightened regions) just had a motherfucking steamed hams reference in tyool 2019. a real subtle one too.


anyone who calls judge eyes anything but its true god given name is a cop.


i think judge eyes might be my new favourite kamorochoverse game...............
~ signed the yakuza poster

posting in the news is identical to posting on 4chan. sorry newsposters, youre all channers now.


> implying more than one person posts in the news


true


j-drama mr brain


Mod Note: Removed mean-spirited joke news post. Sorry to anyone who may have seen it and thus have been spooked by the mean spirit.


Scooby Doo Meets Whoopi Goldberg
Scooby Doo Meets Batman
Scooby Doo Meets Steve Urkel
Scooby Doo Meets Ricky Gervais


duck oh


im making a mario world romhack level for a mario world romhacking forum's mario world romhacking competition. be prepared for a super secret news exclusive mario world romhack level to appear one day mayb........................


excited 2 play the first cutey zone news community project!!


i had some cool ideas but it turns out mario making on the snes is rife with difficulties and all my sprites kept deloading even tho im sure i was well within the limits and anyway sorry folks, get unprepared for it


yakuza 0 introduced an in universe off-brand version of dragon quest, arakure quest, but yakuza 7's trailer revealed that dragon quest also exists in this fictional universe.
this raises several questions as arakure quest was presented as being very popular in the yaku-verse, while dragon quest has gone unmentioned until now.

are we to believe that dragon quest itself is a clone of arakure quest or is the opposite implied? if it is the latter, why would a clone be so popular? food for thought.


also i want to know if kabukicho exists in the yakuverse and if anybody finds it strange that it's almost identical to kamurocho


(https://i.imgur.com/iCprMz8.png)


matt thorson go on cutey zone


(https://i.imgur.com/T6DuyIs.png)


i got a trial of xbox gamepass for pc and here's my review of all those critically acclaimed games ive finally gotten to play

into the breach: its ok, i cant motivate myself to play any more now ive beaten it once
ori and the blind forest: shit
dead cells: shit
steamworld dig 2: p good, best game of the bunch
guacamelee 2: alright when it stops trying to tell jokes
forza horizon 4: ok junk food game

and the less critically acclaimed games
crackdown 3: fun junk food game when im not clipping through the floor and dying
sea of thieves: i literally dont know what the purpose of this game is but sometimes its alright when things happen beyond the game's control???? i would love to see the design documents and figure out what they were trying to do though because it feels like they built a big sandbox and forgot to put any sand in it


i heard ori of the blind forest was good - will be avoiding it now that ive read this cutey zone news review


i was kind of down on ori when it sprung an instant death trap on me early on with no warning, and then sent me back 15 minutes, including losing all my collectibles, because id forgotten about the whole making your own checkpoints mechanic (which is honestly a good mechanic but needed to be coupled with more designer set checkpoints rather than as an almost complete replacement)

i uninstalled when it gave me a new ability and not long after expected me to use it to do a flawless chain of events involving precision aiming at very small targets under time pressure and with enemies respawning around me. i tried it several dozen times minutes, eventually told myself "one more go and im done" and then nuked it from my hard drive and then i wrote a review in the cutey zone news


wait just saw this - im down for cutey discord


madeline celeste is trans, yet another helix games community success story (https://i.imgur.com/YsCFwdq.gif)


theres people arguing its not stated explicitly and the signifiers wouldnt necessarily mean shes trans, and id agree with if that if people were trying to figure out the trans status of someone irl by those same signifiers (holy shit, dont do that), but when theyre specifically put there by a designer in a game made by a team with multiple trans and/or nonbinary people, its pretty obviously supposed to be a nod to folks who would be (and are) happy to see some positive representation in a game


theres no cutey discord yet,,, i started making one maybe a year ago and discord put a crown i couldnt get rid of next to my username because i was the server creator, and i didnt want to be the becrowned one so i immediately deleted it without sharing the link, but if you want to set one up and dont mind being the chat monarch feel free.


if they were trying to hint that madeline is trans they made a huge mistake only putting one pill bottle beside her bed, she should have something like three to five


also i like how when you do the "character gamename" joke its normally supposed to sound ridiculous but "madeline celeste" is just a cool and mostly normal name


kinda wanna change my irl name to madeline celeste now...... too bad i already know people with those names and already had all my dox updated


Ogmo Comics, a loosely grouped series of comics made by members of the Helix Games Community[3] regularly featured characters from the games of Matt Thorson, including the titular Ogmo from the Jumper series[4], and the many fan-games they spawned.

These comics were often surrealist, and frequently referenced the in-jokes and head-canon of community members. Many of the creators[who?] have cited the webcomic Thinkin' Lincoln as a primary inspiration.

One recurring character, Choc-mo[9], famously appeared as an unlockable character in Super Meat Boy Forever.


im the brand new star of the net world


ai the somnium files review
by cait cuteyzone for cuteaku dot com

folks i played this game and laughed at a gag, but then when i referenced this gag to a friend, they thought i was referencing an identical pop team epic bit and im afraid to say the game sucks now.

Title: Re: News Purge: 2020-09-25
Post by: SquareWheel on September 25, 2020, 03:14:08 AM

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

(actually it's good, and definitely one of the top two 2019 games wherein greg chun voice acts a well-meaning but horned up protagonist trying to solve murders that take place in tokyo and which involve gouged out eyes and the yakuza and congressmen and dementia)

im queen of this brawl
and ill show you all


saw someone criticising a narrative the other day for having an unambiguously happy ending, and it's got me thinking: why does so much adult targeted media shy away from having things work out in the end?

i think it would be nice to see more stories have positive upbeat endings, and for people to appreciate those stories that do.


"happy endings where everything is fine are unrealistic" seems like such a weird criticism, and seems to stem from a culture where anything targeted at anyone above the age of 10 has to have a bittersweet ending at best. and i wonder if the fact that so much of our culture is built around consuming these stories lends to the better things aren't possible mindset.

for all the flaws of the marvel movies, at least they tend to end with the villain being defeated and everything being ok on a surface level (until the next movie but thats just how serials work).

dont get me wrong, ive absolutely enjoyed stories with real downer endings, one of my favourite games ever has two endings that are both downers in different ways, but im so ready for more stories written for adults that dont end in misery and for society as a whole to embrace that


im brainstorming an idea for a visnov about a tiny forum and im not gonna lie folks, its basically this place

anyway ive come up at least three very funny vignette ideas so it's practically in the polish stage at this point. all i need to do now is code and graphics


https://thumbs.gfycat.com/EnlightenedUntidyBaiji-mobile.mp4


happy georgetober, everybody go psot on the georgedrome


i was talking to an 18 year old and they thought it was very amusing that i call emoticons "emoticons", so ive decided to start calling them smilies instead out of spite


decided to become one of those old people who goes "bet u dont even know what a floppy disk is" to anyone under the age of 40.


the 18 year old tried to tell me about five nights at freddy's lore today


had to use a mans toilet for men today at the office im working from and let me tell you, there are so many men who handle their meat at the urinal and dont wash their hands that i am never shaking a dudes hand ever again


sat in a toilet cubicle desperately trying not to pay attention to the sound of people entering and leaving and sinks very clearly not being used


making a point of putting on disposable gloves and burning them afterwards every time i meet a new person or have to use their keyboard

Even if Death Stranding’s narrative was good — and it’s not — a game needs to have actual gameplay. What you find within is abysmal; frustrating, tedious and beyond repair, it is to be avoided at all costs.

7/10


im curious what a game would have to do to get a 6/10 from that reviewer. whats the escalation from "avoid at all costs"


putting all of my good health and fortune into research, bribes, lobbying and anything else that could protect me from ever accidentally playing a game that received 30% less than a perfect score from a website on line


i watched a tv show that wasnt a cartoon and it was pretty good it was called giri/haji and itll be out on netflix some time in the future, potentially even right now depending on when youre reading this

"cheque" it out


my media consumption now consists entirely of violent yakuza themed/adjacent tv shows and games, and cartoons for children about ducks and gay space rocks

im sure one day someone will make something that fulfils both of these requirements simultaneously


i dunno if its already happened by the time im posting this but thats cool and i hope it goes/went well!!!


thanks..... it went well. what went well, you ask? Nothing


"im glad nothing went well"
~ me, a nihilist


currently in a working environment where everyone seems incredibly internet poisoned and constantly shares pictures of cry cats and pickle ricks and that cgi face that says succ

someone bought a hog roast sandwich so i made a v funny 30-50 feral hogs ref and nobody got it. fucking zoomers dont know shit.


update: someone played the duck lemonade song youtube video and someone else said, to my fucking face, "wow i remember that from the early days of the internet". it came out in 2009


THEY DIDNT RECOGNISE ALL YOUR BASE OR GOATSE


heavens vaults a good game and has far more to it than i was expecting. a goty of 2019


ive apparently boarenstained my way into the universe where who framed roger rabbit is not an adaptation of a novel called who killed roger rabbit and im not really sure what to do with this knowledge


i feel like ive probably done shifts like this a few times. incredibly inconsequential things changing, like history's quietly corrected itself and i'm the only one who's noticed. even things like waking up with a slightly different face. could be cool if i found a way to control where i landed.


wait shit, i wrote all this out because i was thinking about it last night but i just did another google search about it to finally shut the case, and im back in the who killed roger rabbit timeline, except now it's called who censored roger rabbit.

i know for a fact that i looked this up a few months back and there was absolutely nothing online about it. it just didn't exist. i made myself look stupid in front of a cute girl because i mentioned it as an interesting fact and then neither of us could find it on google. and now it's back. wtf


(https://www.gombergkites.com/LM-DUCK.JPG)


currently in a working environment where everyone seems incredibly internet poisoned and constantly shares pictures of cat planet cats and 100 mountains and that joogle teaser that says Ir is Gomirg

someone bought a giant duck kite so i made a v funny Shanko Porn ref and nobody got it. fucking zoomers dont know shit.


lmao


(https://i.imgur.com/LhSBa9A.png)


(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EKLru2PX0AAeAb1.jpg)


im pretty sure this high quality rip has a sample that mentions cat planet

i havent taken a shit in over 4 days now and rather than telling a doctor, ive decided to let folks who read the cutey zone news know
Issue Resolved Support ticket closed


saw a rat climbing up a fence in my garden the other night. i guess it really is a rats world


rip this stupid fucking planet. im glad its dying.


in less hell world for death cult idiots electing another complete racist dipshit to own the libs news, the harley quinn cartoon is p good as far as cartoons for adults go. first ep was maybe a bit too mean spirited in parts, but 2 and 3 have been fun

update: and 4 and 5. harley quinn gets the certified Cutey Zone Cartoon Zone Cuality Zone award


I just figured out how to get here again


Why have a cutey discord when you could have a cutey slack


cutey zone msn messenger group chat


i cant believe the new mainline yakuza game is a jrpg with turn based battles, a pokemon collection system, dungeons, and a mario kart minigame. yakuza is the best


the webmanga, trixie slaughteraxe for president, just released its final update so if you want to read the only good comic on line nows your chance
http://trixie.thecomicseries.com/comics/first/


Happy New Year from everyone at the Cutey Zone, except Guest.


cutey zone official games of 2019 as voted for by cutey zoners on the cutey zone

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2019_in_video_gaming


heres my personal gotys, which is also just a list of all of the games i played for the first time this year because i don't play anything that isn't a goty contender

CrossCode
Yakuza 5
To the Top
Baba Is You
Etrian Odyssey Nexus
Judge Eyes
Tametsi
Xenoblade 2: Torna - The Golden Country
Xenoblade 2
Factorio
Dreams
Red Matter
Druidstone: The Secret of the Menhir Hills
Rats' World
Tales of Berseria
Heart of the Woods
Spelunker Party
Persona Q2
Wolf Pupy
Dragon Quest Builders 2
AI The Somnium Files
Kine
Molek Syntez
Raging Loop
Heaven's Vault
Ryu Ga Gotoku 7 Demo
Death Stranding
and im going to add eliza to the end of this list even though i only just bought it and haven't played it yet
also outer wilds was good even though 99.6% of my experience of the game was lying down and giving instructions to someone else while they pressed the buttons for me


i picked a good time to stop watching the news and only play videogames, eat hot chip and be bisexual


our cat is asleep in our drawer
her name is Dora
it was meant to be


I've spent too long sitting here trying to think of some top bantz to put in here, but I'm coming up with nothing, so bye.


is dora short for adorable because she sounds it


folks, the something awful paywall has been up for a couple of days now so im going to finally buy an account. here's to many years to come of reading and posting on the good forum something awful!


oh dear


reserving this spot to write my gtmmcty list (games that made me cry this year), which is practically synonymous with my goty list

1. eliza

my eyes got a bit wet at the part of death stranding where youre walking off [sp]to the corpse incinerator with lou and theme of baby kicks in[/sp] but i didnt actually cry so it only gets an honorary mention.
also only got damp eyes at part of yakuza 0 too because ive played it before so im partially immune to it this time around.


elizas v good and id say ultimately uplifting (there's a branch point towards the end so i'm not sure what the other endings are like but i can't imagine they'd be too different tonally) but i was not expecting it to hit so hard and as close to home as it did so many times, especially this one client towards the end of the story. gave me a lot to think about.


it would own if someone made a game that just comes free and preinstalled on every system capable of playing games that guides you through basic game concepts so i never have to play another opening sequence that pauses the action to tell me i can tilt the left analog stick to move in a direction


what if instead of every game having an identical sequence where you have to angle the camera to look at points of interest to very cleverly and invisibly gauge whether you want inverted camera controls or not, what if that was just a fucking option in the system settings/a prompt via a normal menu screen before the game starts rather than interrupting everything in the exact same way every time i play a videogame


"wow im so clever and smart" i think to myself, as i cleverly contextualise every possible menu option as part of the critical path of the game's story and a wizard asks the protagonist if they want to drink a potion that hides blood completely or one that makes it green


*black screen, hospital noises* nurse! they're coming to! quick, patient, give me a thumbs up with your left hand if you want vertical sync mode enabled. this will prevent the image from tearing at the potential cost of frame rate. ok good now open your eyes *low res low detail graphics appear*, now give me one thumbs up in rapid succession for 480x320 resolution, two thumbs up in rapid succession for 600x480 resolution, three th [...] good, you're almost ready to be discharged, we just need you to pick the person who looks most like you from this list of photos, and fill out this personality test before you can leave or go near any mirrors or anything important happens.


love when a game starts in media res so theres action happening immediately, but the protagonist has inexplicably forgotten how to jump or fire a gun until they have been reminded and all the enemies have spontaneously decided to position themselves unnaturally to serve a purpose in demonstrating gameplay mechanics that the developer is proud of but are never practical outside of the tutorial zone.


i was watching a tv show online earlier and somehow a video ad for a "vr sex doll" game got past my adblocker and it seemed incredibly unpleasant. just a dead eyed freckly automaton dispassionately crawling all over me like i was a carpet she'd dropped a contact lens onto.


a shag carpet


(https://i.imgur.com/eaf7BZp.png)


i hate programming and programmers and this entire stupid planet. why is there not a single ide that doesn't have one stupid tiny flaw that just completely breaks my workflow.


(https://i.imgur.com/GWIML4G.png)

why would you want to do that?


big shoutouts to vs code and the debug watch panel that doesn't wordwrap or detach from the sides of the screen so your options are to keep stretching the entire side bar back and forth at the cost of being able to see your code whenever you want to check a specific variable/function at runtime, or you get a job as a buddhist monk farmer or something and never look at a computer again.


someone should come up with a way to destroy all computers but still somehow keep videogames (but also destroy all gamers).


atom seems promising at first glance. very customisable. dont think any of the debugging extensions do what i need though but i might stick with it for actually writing code and use another ide for debugging.

update: ahahaha nope nevermind the fucking autocomplete wont work properly and i can find no earthly way to fix it. im repeatedly arriving at different solla sollews only to find a different slippard in the lock each time

update2: i think i figured it out. the secret is to completely reinstall everything 5 times until you manage to do the one combination of things that fixes it (ie, install autocomplete-python and copy grammar3.7.txt renaming it grammar3.8.txt) without doing anything extra that might make that solution not work. love 2 program on the computer


hello original poster of this post to inform you that the poster of this post has decided to unpost this post thank you and have a nice.


you can resize embedded images with img width=666 but i guess that doesn't help so much for a pic with tiny text (but an avid news reader can click images resized in that way to get the full size version anyway)


was going to vote for bernie sanders but it turns out he maybe potentially said (but probably didnt actually say) something about women struggling to become president because of the public's sexism to liz warren 2 years ago and she just decided to take offense at it a day before an important debate, so instead i have decided to vote for hair sniffer biden, a man who definitely said the thing on the record in public about women not being able to become presidents, instead


the only thing that can stop a horrible misogynist racist with dementia is a good misogynist racist with dementia #nomalarkey #teamjoe #imwithhim


cant vote for this dangerous anti semite bernie sanders *holds finger up to earpiece* he's jewish? shit, whats the other thing that briefly worked against that one english guy. ok yeah. uhh bernie hates women so much he's running against one.


folk's i got a certificate to prove im good at cloud. think ill learn block chain next.


heres my main takeaway from learning how to do clouds:

serverless architecture is a lie and this tweet explains a lot about the tech industry

(https://i.imgur.com/KxKDZ8Y.png)


"Like Mario and Princess 'Beach'"
~ a main character in an important cutscene in death stranding, a game by hideo kojima


thinking about getting overly invested in the discourse online


today it's the "is it ever ok to sign the thigh of a 31 year old woman at a signing event if she specifically asks you to sign her thigh and you're ok with doing that but a games journalist who sees a picture online is not ok with it" discourse


someone should make a game where you've got to solve a mystery working backwards from the memes people are making about it, like obra dinn but with image macros.


god imagine a world where literally the most villainous people possible werent in almost every position of power. thatd own


i saw some graffiti earlier that looked like this and it's precious and i will fight anyone who tries to paint over it
(https://i.imgur.com/HLu8PUT.png)
(this is my recreation from memory because i couldnt take a photo but it's very important and every detail is accurate)


uhhh there's an episode of the harley quinn cartoon with a giantess vore joke so im sorry but it's cancelled now.


there's a little indie movie you might not have heard of thats pretty good, its called parasite and i enjoyed it a lot even knowing the entire premise and having all the hype built up beforehand


also watch giri haji


i watch that harley quinn cartoon it's a little gratuitous but i watch it i guess


Benny Harvey RIP

Miss ya big man

Gone but not forgotten


they tairned the weans against ye mate aye?


/!\ game recommendation /!\ lair of the clockwork god, the third in the ben there dan that series of adventure games

you can probably get an idea of what the gameplay is from a trailer, but what a trailer can't demonstrate is how funny and clever the puzzles get (while still being totally solveable without a walkthrough) and how, even though the game is incredibly edgy and crude and regularly goes too far and keeps going, it's all in good fun and has never once felt like it's been punching down


it's honestly refreshing, between clockwork god and harley quinn, to be able to enjoy something that's so gratuituous (which is the perfect word btw, thanks other news poster) in so many ways without having to be on guard for it to suddenly drop some ableism or transphobia out of nowhere for a cheap gag


taking it upon myself to reply to every tweet i see with a random gif referencing one (1) of the keywords of said tweet

for example, if you mention that you have been involved in a serious accident and you're taking some time away from online to recover, i will post a gif of the heath ledger joker saying "why so serious"


alternatively if im feeling spicy i might engage fuzzy search and  post a gif of david tennant dr who saying "timey wimey wibbly wobbly stuff"


thinking about how everyone calls each other a bot online when they dont agree with what they have to say, but never when people post zero effort zero content awareness basic pattern recognition image/gif responses to fucking everything

Title: Re: News Purge: 2020-09-25
Post by: SquareWheel on September 25, 2020, 03:14:15 AM

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

oh maybe i can tag artdecider when i see a cute girl do a selfie too. thats a cool interesting and very normal thing to do


after 108 positive steam reviews for lair of the clockwork god, the first negative one has come in, with their main complaint being that the game should be "less jumper 3 and more lost vikings" and it is so funny to me that of all the masocore platformers that that exist, jumper 3 is the one they reference (also the platforming isn't even world 1 of celeste difficult so i dont know what this person's deal is or what their mmgf profile name was)


ah, this bloodstained ritual of the night game is very "an untitled story" esque


97% of teens are cowards who capitulated to maddy thorsons mid-development rename of the videogame, untitled
put this in your signature if youre one of the 3% of teens who are still fighting the good fight


https://www.lesswrong.com/posts/tscc3e5eujrsEeFN4/well-kept-gardens-die-by-pacifism


come drink biiru in teh fnuhaus


o rly


im sad this forum doesnt get many post's any more and im sorry i dont post more

whatever happened to q


he was posting on the georgedrome for a while and suddenly deleted his account and disappeared completely


the guy who started powerup comics is doing a reread of them all on twitter with his own commentary and wow the strips i made are being credited for a lot more recurring jokes and plot points than i realised i was responsible for


which ones were yours?


i did the arc where jack thompson becomes a gamer, the one where jack thompson chainsaws shadows arm off and shadows eyebrows disappear because i forgot to redraw them for some reason, the arc where moobs realises he's shadow's twin brother (which someone else ran with to set the lore of everyone being related to shadow), the one where dorkwinkle's a furry, the "oh god oh god shadow" alternate timeline one, the "itsa me moobs" one and a few miscellaneous other ones.

theres one arc that kind of has my design tics, but i dont remember making it at all and the content is 100% not something the 12 years younger me would/could have written or drawn the extra assets for, but it's still bothering me how much it otherwise looks like one of mine.

i dont remember if i made any of the surprising number of "ha ha what if shadow suddenly turned into a girl wouldnt that be cool :-)  :-)  :-)" strips or whether i just strongly considered making one, but it turns out everyone else who made one is a girl now anyway, so.


DilberMC


pouring out a 40 for the two news posts someone made before the server jump that didn't make it across

miss you fellas


what did banjo say when he met kazooie in france?

"bonjour kazooie"


game idea for yall, the villain of the game keeps giving you sidequests that count towards your completion percentage but they're all impossible and/or fatal


videogames are all about escaping to fantastical worlds and their sewer systems.


this magical world is interesting and all, but what i really want to do is see where its denizens' pee and poo goes.


timed underwater sewer level escort mission with ice physics and limited light


DOCTOR WHO REBOOT SEASON 1 LOST FOOTAGE UNEARTHED

ive been to that park. it's alright. think he's overhyping it a bit. solid 8/10.


im on posting strike, i will not post until my number of cutes is at least equal to my postcount


https://cutey.zone/index.php?action=modifykarma;sa=applaud;uid=54;topic=194.30;m=5369;e1f99c50d8=2f83cdfe64aeef49d34e7758db999290 click me


thinking about posting a thread posing the question "what does ogmo feel like to touch" because i think he would feel soft and warm and spongey except for the edges which would be cold and his eyes would be smooth and cold but i want to hear what other people think

anyway feel free to make the thread yourself if you dare, this ones on me

rerelease the song but change that one line to "WoW level 120"


i think jumper 1&2 ogmo would be hard and smooth with very sharp edges like a block of pure steel but the one from the celeste cameo would be warm and squishey. not sure about j3 ogmo...


oh i was trying to reconcile all the different ogmos but yeah it makes way more sense if all the ogmos feel different

i think j1/2 ogmo would feel like a hollow woodblock and theyd make a clonk noise when they hit a wall


i hate that tlocs a meme now but all the cool meme kids only care about the dancing triforce and think the actual shorts are unironic and "cringe"


its like someone discovering youtube poops in tyool 2020 and their take away being "oh my god it sounds like egg man says penis? did nobody notice that when they made this? were people stupid back then????"


me every day for 13 years: god i love tloc i wish more people knew about tloc
monkeys paw:


that said, i would happily see a million more people go "wow epic triangle" if i never had to see one more fucking ronaldinho soccer meme. absolute trash meme. even worse than the "nobody:   " meme


nobody:
nobody:
nobody:
me: this is the quietest organisation xiii meeting ever xD


chorvs


it's been a while but the dragon quest music started happening again. why is an entire orchestra playing dragon quest music somewhere near my house. frick off.


wow dodnt disrespect ronaldinho soccer..... he says ha ha ha


new meme idea: steamed hams again


steamed hams but skinner is the stonks guy


there's a dead forum somewhere out there and im the only poster and someone else logged in today so i made a post acknowledging them and they saw it and changed their username to blank it out in what i can only assume was a panic and now i feel a little bad


i leaned a little too much into the mock hostility "ummm?? how dare u pass by and not say hello, Guest?? ??" because i didnt expect them to show up again or at least not so quickly but i guess i could have directly addressed them in any tone and itd have been spooky as fuck


if, by some twist of fate, that person is now reading this news page........... hello............. Tallarico12


once i was lurking in a 500+ members discord for like a year and one day a mod added me to a secret room and asked me if i wanted to join the conversations a little and i freaked the fuck out and quit the server and never rejoined


posting where i know people will see it and then people see it: ew. gross. yuck. hate it.

posting where there's only a small chance someone will see it and then someone sees it: yes. get in. woot. love that.


this absolutely extends to my real life and i refuse to go to any places where i know i'll definitely see another human being


been playing this "umineko" game. pretty f*cked up and twisted xD


i hate horror movies and normally dont get on with horror games but i think visual novels and their natural strengths and limitations make things feel simultaneously far more bearable and also a lot more horrific


like wow cool for the last of us 2 they forced animators to watch live leak footage of decapitations or whatever and i bet the result's not even a fraction as effective or worthwhile as turning a portrait grayscale and putting a red paint splotch over half their face (also please dont make artists watch snuff films what the fuck)


i think as well with visual novels, you get to hear a character's internal monologue, which isn't something you can do in the more cinema influenced game formats (at least not without doing it as a voiceover and that's a stylistic choice that doesn't work with a lot of things).

to me, a block of text about how a character is feeling and reacting, coupled with a lurid description of a messed up scene is a million times more effective than a million dollar mo-capped polygonal pseudo-human fake retching in front of photogramettried mincemeat.


props to nier and nier automata for being the only 3d "cinema" games i can think of that get that visnov segments are v good and evocative and can totally work in otherwise non-visnov genre games


broke: having a location in your aaa videogame that reeks of a stench and not letting the player know in any way
joke: having a character in the game say "christ this reeks of a stench"
woke: squiggly green stink lines everywhere
bespoke: controllers that automatically scratch and sniff a thing that comes with the game at the relevant points and there's closed captions that say "[REEK OF STENCH]" in case the player has anosmia


visual novels are so cool in general, idk why there arent just more visual novel ports of novels and things with thematically relevant art and music.


ok boomineko


might play this Your Turn To Die game ive been hearing so much about. man it would be dope and sweet to go on the same forum as the translator of that game. especially if it was also the forum cat planet came from.

wow i have also been playing umineko..... cant believe i am playing the same video game as someone on the cutey zone


i just finished ep2 and it is pretty fucked up and twisted to be honest


(https://i.imgur.com/yjteaMC.png)


me when i encounter a closed room murder
(https://i.imgur.com/56kO2D4.png)


woah i just finished ep 2 too and yeah i certainly wasn't expecting any of that

update: a good few hours into finished ep 3 now and this is incredible. why did i take so long to start playing this properly?? why??


Ushiromiya Gamer


just opened a schroedinger's cat box only to find a hempel's raven =_=


im partway through ep3 and it has some cool twists so far.... really good game....


now that im maybe halfway through episode 8 (it's still very very good) im checking out footage of the umineko pachinko and fighting games, and they feel like elaborate shitposts.


very high quality 2d fighting game spritework and backgrounds, meanwhile the sound effects are all metal_rattle_2.wav, ahahaha.wav and itsperfecto.ogg and i don't think i'd want it any other way


ps5 event verdict:

stray looks really cute and it's 100% my highlight of the show, resi 8's probably gonna be great even tho those games arent my scene, prismata might be ok, and im sure that volcano high game is probably gonna be fun for all the monster fuckers out there, demons souls ps3 was ugly but it sure had a good oppressive atmosphere that the new one's dropped in favour of Grafixxxxx just like bluepoint did to shadow of the colossus, everything else in the show was dogshit

e: oh yeah massive lol at opening the show with ps3 game, gta 5


i like how theyre making new and functionally interchangeable littlebigplanet and astrobot games that dont have the things people liked about littlebigplanet and astrobot (level creation and vr respectively)


also ratchet and clank games just keep getting progressively worse aesthetically (and also every other way). just amorphous blurry glowing messes but i guess the robot's raytraced now.


imo just bring back ps2 graphics for everything. high enough fidelity for things to look like what they're supposed to be, but not so high that game design and readability have to take a backseat to every blade of grass reflecting every ray of sunlight directly into your eyes while a billion particles fly in every direction


people are making the router jokes but actually the ps5 looks like a digital tv set top box from circa 2001 and the disc tray is where you put your chipped piracy card to get the pay to watch channels, im actually glad we're getting a weird monster box console design again after 20 years of sleek dvd players

still not buying one though


sorry for being so negative earlier........ stray looks so cool


the harley quinn cartoon is so gooddddd


i want to post on the cutey zone because it's been like a month since anyone posted but i dont know what to post about and dont want my cutes/posts ratio to go down.......


im still only on episode 4 of umineco..... i wish i had more time to play it


a forum i like to read might be closing down and is definitely imploding because the owner's a sex pest (curse of all big forums) and everyone is talking about splintering into a million different discords, which kind of sucks

i miss forums. just make an smfforfree or something.


haha what is this new points system on steam. who is it even for.


i finished umineko just over a week or so ago but im still thinking about it a lot and remembering things out of the blue and going "oh? OHH!!!" i'm so glad i played it


keir starmer shut the fuck up and fuck off challenge. bring back corbyn.


i wanna play higurashi.....................


if anyones looking for a cheap and solid 7/10 time filler game with little to no lasting emotive impact but a bunch of cool locations and puzzles that range from not-even-a-puzzle to frustrating, may i recommend "infra"

(this is a sincere recommendation, infra owns  and it's wild how ambitious and varied this game is for the budget it probably had and 7/10 games are the best and most interesting type of game)


a thing i like about infra is the puzzles are completely slapdash. there's no escalation or throughline or theme to them. they're mostly just engineering themed escape rooms or route finding exercises and it's honestly kind of refreshing after a million games trying to ape the portal formula.

there's a really nice ebb and flow to the locations too. you're sometimes above ground, sometimes below ground, sometimes in a modern location, sometimes in a run down abandoned location. every place feels fundamentally different and there's a lot of nice vignettes. i'm maybe just over the halfway point and even though it's occasionally frustrating, i'm enjoying it a lot despite, or maybe even because of that.


(https://i.imgur.com/47t0PNR.png)

sand undertale


im still on episode 4 of umineko..... havent had much time to play it.... its really good but it feels so fucking long because theres even more layers of storytelling going on


i cant wait until i am done so i can search for Umineko Memes and laugh at the ufnny pictures without worrying about spoilers


i saw a bunch of umineko memes before i played the game, so when i actually played it 3 months later id forgotten most of what i'd seen, and the things that i thought might be important plot points ended being casual throaway one-line references in the game that the fans just ran with


umineko rules. gotta reread that one soon. i want to get it on steam though and im broke so i dunno when i will.


like 2 years ago i put a version of the an untitled story title screen on siivagunner where it was the flintstones theme but on the final note it turns into the joogle title screen midi just to see if anybody here would click on it and listen to the whole thing and go "wait what the heck" but no one ever said anything


oh i thought the tune seemed familiar but i didnt know what the post flintstones goof actually was and none of the comments mentioned it


sorry, joogle bros was before my time


going back and removing random letters from random news posts as phase one of a 20 year arg


(actually i just noticed some weird typos ive made in the past and this is a desperate attempt to obfuscate because otherwise i will spend an inordinately long time correcting everthing i've ever written)


the 20 year arg comes to a tragic halt only 4 years in when the zelda: ocarina of time cartridge found in a hollowed out war memorial  has the what3words geolocation in its filenames wiped by cuteARG.website user iLoveWasps69's infant son, thus preventing anyone from finding the nichijou lunchbox in a south sudanese minefield containing a usb pen with an audio file of anime voice actresses farting which, when played backwards, parsed as morse code and translated from gaelic, would have


i think i could live without 9 extended versions of a track showing up in youtube search results before it finally gives me the original 27second version


thinking of making a screencap and posting it every time i see a tweet that has 69 or 420 or 666 likes, seems like a fun and interesting thing to do


thinking of making a twitter bot that screencaps every tweet that has 69 or 420 or 666 likes and replies to the original poster with the screencap, and also corrects people who mix up "your" and "you're"


its really funny and sad that youtube took so fucking long to implement a "loop" feature that it became standard to make 10 HOUR EXTENDED videos of every song in the world


~Weclome to NewsPosts, the Place to Be!~


am i the only person that encountered the bug in an untitled story where if you jump while holding duck in a 1 tile height corridor your character gets stuck


that bug sounds familiar, but it's been so long since i played aus that im not sure if i ever came across it


i posted about some monthly logic puzzles in teh news a while back, but it is with a heavy heart that i retract my endorsement and delete the recommendation because this month's puzzle had some preamble along the lines of "i find this world to be increasingly full of extreme views (and oft actions), and on all sides. thus i bring you this puzzle about balance" and nah dude, keep your puzzle

(for context each month's puzzle has an anecdote or analogy to theme them before the instructions, and they're usually pretty eye-rolling but inoffensive. a few of them in the past have had a very centrist "why do people have to argue about things why can't everyone be friends????" philosophy about them, but this one and the timing of it is so egregious that i think i'm done with them forever even tho the puzzles themselves are usually pretty clever and elaborate)


im making a cool videogame and in the week i've been working on it, i've made one (1) character model, kind of textured it, kind of rigged it, and i made a cool water shader in unity.

on the one hand it's great that i'm learning all these new skills (i've never even looked at a shader before) but on the other i'm incapable of actually starting to make anything playable until i can be certain i wont get mad and rebuild everything from scratch each time i figure out a slightly better workflow.


i finally finished ep4 of umineko last night..... its so good. im excited to get to the answer arcs. im excited to see battler wear the stupid fucking cape he has in the answer arc steam thumbnail


battler is great because every time you start to think he's even remotely cool he'll remind you that he's actually the Dumbest possible Ass


oh no marbles box deleted their account :( thats a bummer, they seemed cool

Title: Re: News Purge: 2020-09-25
Post by: SquareWheel on September 25, 2020, 03:14:23 AM

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

damn that sucks.....


thinking about how umineko came out in 2007, which is about the exact year where i would have become too old to unironically put ~Without love, the truth cannot be seen~ in my forum signature


its 2020 now though and im considering unironically putting ~Without love, the truth cannot be seen~ in my forum signature


casting my visnov shitsposts into the void. . .

i genuinely love landing on the gamefaqs forums and seeing so many still active posters keeping 200X-era signatures alive.


(https://i.imgur.com/34K2FOh.png)


minecraft and meat boy, love it.


im trying to play my fav serious crime drama videogame, Ryu Ga Gotoku, but i accidentally figured out how to play koi koi good and all i want to do is play koi koi now


*later* i mastered koi koi and can beat any opponent with a 100% success rate even though it's partly a game of chance, i'm that good. time to finally progress the storyline of this videogame *get good at shogi* shit


official announcement i am making a rival forum that doesn't suck Ass come to realcutey.zone onice i buy the domain and program the forum software my self from the ground up


realcutey.zone will have an arcade full of flash games to plkay and posting achievements like "made 1000 unique posts beginning with the letter z" to encourage interesting posts and you can pay money to promote your posts to other users as long as theyre not advertising anything


realcutey.zone will not feature a karma system


im going to make truerealcutey.zone, the place to go for the kind of deep and intellectual discussions you cant find on realcutey.zone


i think whenever i see a twitter argument be defused by the two participants, ill inject myself into the conversation to say "wow what a rare sight, a disagreement online ending civilly bravo good sirs/maams" just so at least one person can walk away looking like a dipshit


adding a $10 paywall to realcutey.zone to keep the truerealcutey.zone riff raff out and the posting quality high


i figured out how to properly weight a 3d character model for animation 2 weeks after i gave up and decided to never 3d model again. it turns out the secret that none of the (all weirdly horny) tutorials online about character rigging tell you is that there's a hidden menu option that mirrors the weighting so i don't have to paint weights for the left arm and then painstakingly try and do the exact same for the right. i only found out by chance in a game jam dev stream despite googling for this exact feature multiple times and finding nothing. why is this stuff so poorly documented. aargh.


making a 3d game seems like hell, thats why all my games are made with indie retro pixel art from the 80's


yeah it is absolutely hell. even before i started working on the game proper, i decided to make all the npcs sprites just because i knew how much of a pain character modelling would be.

if it weren't for the amount of animation and angles they'll need, i'd be incredibly tempted to just have a sprite protagonist too at this point.

turns out sprite npcs in unity are more effort than they're worth


I've turned myself into a pickle, Battleeeeeeer!!


the feel of not understanding the appeal of pickle rick jokes until you see an umineko one and understanding instantly


without pickle rick, the funniest shit can not be seen


(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EflRg0wWsAARTjj?format=jpg&name=large)


if higurashi gba wasn't real that image would be a pretty good way to prank some gullible cutey zone news reader into looking up whether there was really a fucking gba port of higurashi


i am still only on episode 5 of umineko but im just thinking this morning about how much i love umineko. changing my name to UminekoFan91 (irl name not username)


Yes, I am Featherine Augustus Aurora, and I am the author of the works known as "Jumper Community Forums", "Helix Games Community", and "Helix Community". Would you like to read my most recent work?


i dont have a twitter to answer over there but i think a cursed flower would probably offset your sprite from your hitbox. that just seems like a very cursed flower thing, to me


*finally gets a character moving around in 3d space with proper animation and collisions and stuff* 3d game designs good and fun now and i dont hate it any more. i finally know how miyamoto felt when he single handedly made mario's 64th.


i dont know if refusing to use a physics engine for anything but aesthetic stuff is unity game makeing in hard mode, seeing as everyone else seems to handle everything with physics, but it's way more fun to actually think about how to make everything interact like this and i can fine-tune stuff way easier. like setting a hang-time for jumps vs screwing around with disabling gravity for x frames or whatever the hell.


physics engines fucking suck ass. fuck physics


"Ms Beatrice! Is it true the Riddle of the Golden Witch is really just about murder?"

of course not. why would it be about murder? i don't even like murder

[later at the ushiromiya mansion]

(https://i.imgur.com/Ex3axMl.png)


i was playing moon rpg remix adventure earlier, and there was a line near the start of the game along the lines of "with love, you can see the unseeable"


heres a screenshot of the game ive been vagueposting about making in the news for the last month, i might post about it properly one day when i have more to show but im really happy with how it's coming together

(https://i.imgur.com/hHMo3JZ.png)

update:

(https://i.imgur.com/nDU9Bdk.png)


the frogs are friendly btw, i just added the hammer to the game (it's a tool not a weapon, im pretty sure i'm not going to add combat) and thought it made for a funny screenshot


That looks Cute as Fuck.....


thanks!


:watermelon: just dropping a news post to say that youre all cool and cute and thanks for being here to read this :watermelon:


The watermelon's head was split in half, so that you could easily identify the corpse, while being certain that it was truly dead!!!


making games is hard because every time i sit down to do boring stuff like "gameplay" i end up getting distracted by something fun like "design some plants and plop them in there somewhere" and "procedurally generate a city background that you'll never be able to interact with and can barely see from the play field" and "run through that city for 5 minutes because i have special developer out of bounds privileges"


ive been pulling apart spyro the dragon levels for inspiration and one thing i thought was interesting is how the environments in those games are one giant mesh that uses a tilesheet for the textures. each individual poly uses a different tile, and the properties are linked to tiles, rather than using trigger boxes, so just changing the texture can turn a poly into a hurtzone or a ladder.

(https://i.imgur.com/7X4fmn9.png)

i guess it probably wasn't uncommon, but it's cool seeing how many 16bit game design principles were still being used in 3d ps1 games


using all my energy to not get into a stupid argument on the internet about what constitutes a real job lol lend me ur power friends


im playing a puzzle game atm called "a monsters expedition" and it's pretty good (no stephen's sausage roll though, but what is?) but it is very in love with the concept of england

very "cor blimey, bloody england ey? love it. bloody hell. umbrellas. queues. the weather. bloody love it. god bless the queen. wet summers. queues again. blummin heck. gaw bless." like the bit from pottergame but unironically

update: i beat the game and the writing doesnt even go anywhere or have any thematic reasoning. its just *picture of an oar* "Big Spoon: Humans in Englandland used these big spoons to stir rivers while riding boats. This one was found in St Pancras Station" all the way to the end and then it stops. nice puzzles though, definitely my third favourite sokoban-like-like behind pipe push paradise and sausage roll.


reader, england fucking blows. worst country by far. "but the US!" where do you think the US came from


im partway through episode 7 of umineko and a big mystery is finally being slowly answered and i love it. its so satisfying to think about everything that lead up to this and feeling things click into place....


its so fun reading old umineko threads on other sites and seeing people working out some of the late game plot points back when ep2 had just been released, and then seeing them convince themselves theyve read too much into it and walking it all back

really goes to show how well plotted the story is though that some people could figure stuff out so early on without it being obvious


 i like england...


englands a deeply diseased country socially and also, right now, very literally. nice scenery in some parts of it though


whats the difference between a duck?

one of its legs is both the same


"Oh, we can zoom all the way to the moon, From this great wide wacky world"
~Jump Up Super Star -Super Mario Odyssey

game theory, this is a reference to the cancelled philips cd-i game, super mario wacky worlds


i have never felt more detached from videogames and videogame culture than right now seeing people mad that theyre still going to make ps4 games instead of locking everything on the expensive new box in the middle of a pandemic thats left everyone jobless.


releasing my games exclusively to the wii u from now on


world is a fuck
~ hatsune miku


wow sad day for all fans of old racist judges who should have retired when it would have been tactically useful, my heart goes out to those people


if i was witnessing the increasingly violent death throes of the facade of the concept of democracy alongside the impotence and capitulation of the people who theoretically uphold it, why, i would simply vote


hope there isnt a civil war or the complete collapse of american society into fascism this november in case it affects my xbox series x preorder and the trade in value of my xbox series x when i realise that there are no games coming out on any next generation system that i'd ever want to play


might do a normal person thing and write fanfictions about dead celebrities meeting in heaven and flossing


john mccain, david bowie and the queen mother just sharing a blunt in heaven when rbg walks in with a couple of tins. beautiful.


newspaper cartoonists making obituary cartoons is basically the professional version of tails gets trolled


@sylviefluff Congrats on your 19.4k ?? tweet! favstar.fm/69420666


wow this really blew up here's a link to my soundcloud cutey.zone


so sick of =_=;;;


good luck posting here idiot we probably hit the limit again


i thought i made the limit huge ass. let me see if this message go's through